Catch Me If I Fall (PJO/Avengers Crossover)

33

You're not.

The last words Loki had spoken to his mother echoed around his head, and he strained to keep them out. How could he have said those words to her? How could he, in his selfish rage, do that to her? She, who had been kind to him no matter what, who had seen him not for what he was, but for who he was? How could he have done that?

He broke down, destroying everything he could, kicking the walls, flipping tables, screaming.

It didn't matter. Nobody could hear him.

Nobody. That's the word that was echoing around now. He had nobody. Percy was Norns know where, in danger, Frigga was dead, and everyone else who knew him saw him as a heartless monster. If anything, they'd probably be happy he was feeling this way.

Let him suffer, he could practically hear them say. He deserves every misfortune, every tribulation coming his way. He deserves nothing but sorrow and dejection.

And, the worst part? He agreed. He knew he deserved this. But Frigga didn't. She deserved beauty and happiness and carefreeness, not this.

He paced the cell for the umpteenth time that day, resisting the urge to rip the skin from his right hand. That always had seemed to calm him when he was younger, but now all it did was cause more pain. He closed his eyes and fell to his knees.

"Why not me?" He called out to no one in particular. "Why couldn't you take me instead?"

He let the tears that had been threatening to spill fall from his eyes at last, and he started to cry, letting out all the suppressed emotions he had been bottling up ever since he arrived on Asgard.

*

(Potentially triggering content (choking/strangling) ahead- I'll let you know when it's over.)

Percy clawed helplessly at Thanos' hand, covered by a golden gauntlet, wrapped around his throat, struggling to breathe. As a god, it wasn't necessary to breathe, but it was incredibly uncomfortable not to do so. Thanos had been holding him like this for an hour now, and the room seemed to be spinning around him.

Thanos' grip tightened, and a small, strangled scream escaped Percy's throat. They stayed like that a while longer until the Titan let go, dropping Percy, coughing and spluttering to the floor. He gulped down as much air as he could, still hardly able to breathe. Something was streaming from his eyes- though he wasn't sure whether it was blood or tears. Maybe both. He put a finger to his throat, running his finger around where Thanos had squeezed. A severe bruise would form there, no doubt. He looked back up at Thanos.

(It's over now.)

"So, Perseus, do you give up?" he grinned, kneeling so he was only a few inches above Percy. Percy took the opportunity to spit in his captor's eye.

"Never," his voice was hardly a whisper- he couldn't speak much louder than that. Thanos was enraged at this, and unsheathed that horrible blade again.

"Alright, then," he smiled sadistically. "Have it your way..."

*

The other half of Percy grimaced and almost fell off of the horse he was riding across the Bifrost Bridge. No, he told himself. You're stronger than this. You're stronger than him.

He dismounted the horse, who had quite the vocabulary. He turned to her and cocked his head to the side. "Can you not?"

The horse then replied with something that shouldn't exactly be repeated, before huffing and having a hostler take her away. Percy smiled sadly and turned around to make his way to the palace.