Inner Demons

25. Why Does It Always Have To Be About Her?

Ella Mae pulled the Shadowford van into the driveway just after ten. Courtney and Mary Anne hardly said a word the whole way home, and I was lost to my own thoughts. I couldn't shake the image of that shadow from my mind.

"Aren't you coming inside?" Courtney asked, holding the door open.

I shook my head. "No, I think I'm going to sit out here on the front porch and clear my head for a minute."

"Okay," she said. "Don't stay out here too long though, it's freezing!"

I laughed. "I'll be okay."

I tossed my duffel bag onto the front porch swing and sat next to it, pushing myself back and forth.

When I'd asked Mrs. King if she still had a tattoo, what was her answer?

Not exactly.

I hadn't been able to understand what she meant by that back then, but now maybe I did. If the tattoo was all about bringing our inner connection to the shadow demons out onto the surface, the final initiation was about taking on an inner demon. An enslaved demon who could only be seen in shadows. Brooke's tattoo had taken on the form of a horse because it was the one thing she loved most of all. Maybe her new shadow demon also took the form of a horse.

I shivered. I would have to pay more careful attention to the women in this town from now on. I needed to study people I knew were in the Order and see if I could recognize their inner demons as well. If no one was going to share any information with me, I would have to figure this out on my own, like a detective.

The sound of a girl's voice echoed off the side of the house, and I stopped swinging. Morgyn?

I got up and tiptoed to the edge of the porch, then looked around the side of the house, careful to stay in the darkness.

"I'm not going to let you go alone, and there's no use arguing about it," Morgyn said. She was standing near the old fountain in the garden talking to Jackson.

"Jesus, Morgyn, why do you have to be so damn stubborn! I'm telling you right now, if you go tomorrow... well, you know as well as I do what's going to happen. We can't take that risk."

"And what do you think will happen if I don't go?" Her voice softened and she placed her hand on Jackson's shoulder.

I felt a twinge of jealousy at the obvious affection in her features. She loved him. I could see it in her face.

Jackson ran a hand through his hair and paced back and forth in front of the fountain. "Maybe we just both stay home," he said. "We could stay here and watch a movie or something. Pop some popcorn."

Morgyn smiled, but it was a sad smile. "That sounds perfect."

Jackson shook his head. "But I can't leave her there unprotected."

"Of course you can," Morgyn said. "She isn't even on their radar. She'll be safe."

"I can't take that risk."

"Why does it always have to be about her?"

I slumped against the side of the house. How much did Jackson know about the Order of Shadows? What exactly was supposed to happen at the dance?

"You know why," he said, so softly I almost didn't hear.

Morgyn took his hand and laced her fingers through his. I knew I had no business intruding on their private moment, but I couldn't tear myself away.

"We're in this together," Morgyn said. "If we have to, we'll fight them together."

Jackson pulled her into a hug and they stayed that way for a long time. Finally, I made my way back to the swing, picked up my bag, and disappeared into the house. I suddenly wasn't looking forward to tomorrow night's dance at all.