Purposefully Accidental

Chapter Forty-two

Apparently, taking care of a toddler by yourself while you're student-teaching full-time as a last-semester grad student is kind of exhausting. Who would've thought.

Back at home, even though I am—for whatever reason—the person she spends the most time with, I still have Mom and Cole and sometimes Dad, and we take turns handling her. But now, in this massive and lonely Upper East Side townhouse, there's only me to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, play with her, and calm her down when she cries. This is... probably tougher than I expected.

Freddie offers to hire a nanny, but I refuse. We still haven't even found the right person to babysit her on the night of the gala next Thursday. She gets antsy enough with strangers and I don't trust just anyone to take care of her either.

So here I am on this considerably sunny Saturday morning despite the slightly colder weather, very much sleep-deprived after a long night of tending to Lucy's incessant cries all night and then staying up late to finish my report for my first evaluation with my supervisor on Monday. And Lucy woke up bright and really freaking early begging to come outside for a walk.

It doesn't even look like she's spent half her usual bedtime hours whining into my chest all night. She's wide-eyed and bouncing in her steps as I take her on a stroll along the eastern side of Central Park, not caring that I'm half-awake with only two and a half hours of sleep last night, all because of her.

I make sure that we haven't strayed too far from Fifth Avenue. I'm trying to keep her from dragging us too far into the maze, because if she gets tired in half an hour, then I would have to be the one to carry her back to Freddie's house on foot, and I don't think I have the energy for that.

Eventually, Lucy finds the playground and I have no choice but to help her as she insists on going on the slide. There's nothing much else to do for a kid her age, but eventually she moves on to pet the passing dogs, excitedly pointing them out to me as we continue walking around.

We walk on a path toward the side entrance nearest to Freddie's house on 70th Street, and to my disappointment, it still doesn't look like Lucy is tired yet. She's still on her feet, humming a happy song to herself, and I'm fearing the moment she realizes we're almost near the zoo. I'm totally dead on my feet and I don't think I could take a zoo trip.

Lucy then stumbles on her own feet a little, and I rush to steady her before she could fall, crouching down to check on her shoes in case it got loose.

Nothing seems wrong, so I ask her, "You tired, Lulu? Wanna rest for a bit?"

But she shakes her head and vehemently replies with her favorite word of the month, "No."

"Alright, alright. But be careful, okay? Walk slowly so you don't trip."

"Uhuh." She bobs her head up and down. Then she looks up, over my shoulder, and tilts her head to the side. "Hmm."

"What is it?" I ask her as I pat her down one more time.

When I look at her face, there's a cute little scrunch on her nose as her eyes focus on whatever's behind me, so I look over my shoulder.

There, about a couple feet away, in tight black shirt and shorts, with gray running shoes on and earbuds in, my friend/ex-boyfriend/current not-boyfriend is lightly jogging, eyes focused on the path in front of him and away from us. I blink a few times to make sure what I'm seeing is real. Maybe a lookalike?

I stand up, holding Lucy's hand in mine as I approach Jonah, waiting for his eyes to dart to the side to catch us. Just as I predicted, he does a double take and strays from his path to meet us.