Feral Hearts

Chapter 14

They held the funeral a few days later. Aside from Mia, Joseph and Wren had also died from Natania's pack. She didn't know how her father could be so stoic about the death of their packmates. The grief was eating her alive, even if they weren't her favourite people they were still pack, while he acted like the funeral was just an inconvenience.

Natania sat close to the pyre, head bowed, while the less injured of the wolves assembled the bodies. It wasn't much longer before the fire was lit. The flames blazed only inches from her muzzle, but Natania didn't move away.

"You saved as many as you could." Natania didn't glance up as fur brushed against her side. Leah's scent was overlaid with the scents of the dead, she had helped prepare the pyre.

"That's not good enough," Natania snapped. She felt Leah's tail run along her back and Natania stepped away, shoulders sagging. She didn't deserve comfort.

"If it wasn't for you, my mother would have been among them," Leah murmured, gazing at the pyre. "Thank you."

Natania closed her eyes but didn't reply. After a few moments of silence Leah stood up. She pressed her nose into Natania's flank once, then walked into the crowd, likely looking for her family. Natania sensed the wolves gathering around the fire, it would burn for hours and only when it went out would they sing.

The ones who had lost someone would stay for the entire burn, but others would only join near the end. Natania would stay until the ashes were cold. The pack was her responsibility, hers to protect, and she had already failed them.

Hours later, another pelt brushed hers. Natania leaned into Sara, inhaling her scent. The cinnamon wolf licked the top of her head like she was a pup and the control she had been holding to with her fingertips snapped. A choking sob escaped her and then there was no holding back tears. Sara wrapped a paw over her shoulder and Natania burrowed against her chest.

"I know it's hard," Sara whispered. "It'll be okay, just breathe."

When her sobs were spent, Natania pulled away and wiped her eyes with her paw. "I'm sorry." The movement sent a jolt of pain through her shoulder, but she ignored it.

Sara cuffed her over the ears gently. "Don't apologize for grieving. I'm here for whatever you need." Sara pressed up against her again. Another wolf crept up on Natania's other side, Branson. Natania nuzzled him once, then turned back to the fire. At least her family had survived.

More pawsteps sounded behind them, Natania quickly glanced over her shoulder. The rest of the pack was joining, now that the fire was almost burned out. The moon shone brightly overhead. It wasn't a full moon, that would be another few days but it would do.

Natania waited another hour, until the final lick of flames was starting to burn out. Natania walked into the ashes of the fire and turned to face the assembled wolves. Rightfully, it should have been her father standing here, but he was nowhere to be seen.

"It's never a good day when a member of the pack is lost," Natania started. "It's even worse to lose so many." She glanced over the ashes and her chest tightened again. "These wolves died bravely, honourably, defending their homes and their families, and we honour their courage, and their sacrifice." Natania turned back to the dwindling flames, and read off the list of the fallen. Mia, Joseph, Wren, Willow, Natania heard Grace cry out as her mother's name was read and blinked back more tears.

The flames died as she read the last one and Natania bowed her head. "May you find swift running, good hunting, and shelter when you sleep." The wolves remained silent for a full five minutes. Even the wind stayed silent as they mourned their dead.

Elise nodded at her when the time had passed. Natania raised her head and howled. She sang alone at first, one lone note at the moon. Then the pack took up her cry, first a few, and then them all, until the sound echoed over the mountains for miles.