daughter of taylor swift and travis kelce imagines

a/n

sorry all of the a/n but like i need to vent but like i don't really know who to talk to. yk? i guess this is just like more of i need advice??

so me and this one girl have been friends since 6th grade and we were best friends we did everything together. we used to hangout literally like every weekend. we went to the eras tour movie together we did everything. she recently just out of the blue ditched me for other people. now i'm not really the most popular. people know me but like i'm not popular. i get made fun of sometimes for liking taylor swift but whatever this is not the point of this.

so as i said she just started to not talk to me. we would always wait for eachother in the morning at school so we could walk together and before lunch so we could walk together. she just stopped waiting for me and i would be waiting at her locker and she never came so i would wait there until a teacher would say that i needed to go to lunch. come to find when i get to the lunchroom she's already in there with other people. when i would try and talk to her she always seemed annoyed whenever i would talk to her so i would just stop talking because i could just sense it. then she just stopped talking to me all together. i honestly felt really alone at school and didn't come for a couple of days because id rather be alone at my own house than at school.

i eventually talked to her about it and she said that it wasn't her intention to block me out like that. i trusted her bc ive trusted her since 6th grade and she was my best friend. fast forward to this week. she started ghosting me once again. she didn't answer my texts. times when i asked to hang out with her she would say she couldn't because her mom was working and then i would se son her story that she was hanging out with the popular ppl she ditched me for. i'm not jealous i'm just mad at the fact that she lied to me. i've given her chance after chance and she still wants to treat me like shit.

now, whenever i try to talk to her infront of those ppl she would like side eye her friends and all that shit. whenever i'd see her in the halls i'd get a dirty look. but whenever she wasn't with them, then she'd want to be friends again and talk to me. so basically at this point i was her backup friend.

and i dealt with this for a while whenever my mental health was bad she was there for me and was the reason i still held on. but now she's making me feel bad about myself. maybe this friendship ended because it was me. this is like all my fault. but i couldn't remember what i could've done to make her upset. but since i lost her is there really still a reason to hang on?? that's honestly why i was mia for that period of time bc my mental health was so bad. i wasn't eating, i though abt sh, i thought about suicide. i didn't tell my parents about that but i told her. i honestly feel so alone rn like i don't have anyone to talk to. and i feel so bad bc what if it's rlly me and im the reason all this shit happened. in no way am i proud of myself. i actually hate myself. i hate how i can never express how i rlly feel to people in person. i hate how i can't talk infront of people. i hate how i look. i fucking hate everything about me. i don't see any good in me. i'm so done with life. but there's a part of me that's trying to hang on. it's getting really hard. i've talked myself out of sh many of times and have never done it before. but honestly it's getting harder. i need to feel something. i haven't eaten in like 3 days. my parents are starting to question me but i tell them im eating and they believe me. i wish k could tell them what's going on i just don't know how. i feel like they'll be ashamed of me.

i know it's good to let go of toxic people or things in your life bc that's how you grow as a person. but once you let go of the person who honestly kept you alive really fucking hurts because now you don't really have a reason to stay. i've been blocking a lot of people out. i haven't been the same person and i honestly miss the person i was. i feel like ive dropped into a deep depression and i don't know how to get out of it. the only thing i see in myself are my insecurities and all of my failures.

taylor is honestly the only thing im running on rn. her music has helped me through many rough times but i feel like its not really enough this time. especially when people always talk shit about how i like taylor and all that crap. but she's like one of the reasons i'm still alive so getting made fun of for that honestly just makes me wanna just go away even more.

i know starving myself isn't healthy but like i feel like i need to do it. i need to be punished bc everything bad i do in life is my fault right? i honestly need a fucking break i'm so tired. and if u read all of this please leave some advice i rlly fucking need it.