Waiting for Hope

Higher

Higher - creed

Saturday night rolled around and Ethan was glad to be able to spend more time with Hope. They had talked on the phone frequently, spending time laughing about all of the random topics of conversation that came up. He had the best talks with her, both about the serious and the ridiculous. And he was happier than he had been in a very long time.

That night was spent watching movies at his apartment. Josh had gone home to visit his parents for the weekend, so they had the place to themselves. Ethan got a few movies, some comedies that he thought Hope would like. They ate a simple dinner together and enjoyed the movies. His favorite part was sitting with his arm around her, feeling the warmth of being so close to her.

The second movie was ending as Ethan felt Hope glance over to him, watching him laugh. He looked back at her and their eyes locked. He felt his stomach clench as she looked deeply into his eyes. Their gaze held for a while, neither breaking contact. Ethan sensed that Hope had a new confidence about being close to him. He could feel a physical pull towards her and that she seemed now willing for him to close that gap between them.

His eyes moved to her lips, lips that he had wanted to kiss for what seemed like his entire life. Her constant gaze let him know she was ready, she wouldn't look away this time as she did by the little stream. But something in him was holding back.

He had several thoughts simultaneously. First was elation that their relationship was moving in that direction. But the second thought is what stopped him from moving ahead in that moment. They were sitting on his couch. The thought of kissing her on a couch, any couch, made him feel sick. He had shared too many kisses on another much more tattered couch.

Ethan did not want Hope to be one of those kisses. He wanted no part of his past mistakes to invade his future with her. He would not share his first kiss with this most amazing girl on a couch, she was too special.

So rather than lean forward and close the gap, he looked away. He felt Hope inhale sharply and start to scoot away from him. She felt rejected and he felt terrible. That was the last thing he wanted her to feel. So he used the arm that still circled her shoulders to pull her closer to him. He would kiss her, and soon. But it needed to be right.

"I have an idea" he said quietly.

She looked up at him, "What would that be?"

"Well, I work the morning shift tomorrow, and I'll be off around 4. Why don't I come out to you. We can go on a hike and watch the sunset." He looked deeply into her eyes when he mentioned the sunset, trying to remind her of their conversation earlier in the week. He had wanted to be with her when she saw the sunset on the hilltop for the first time. That was when he would kiss her.

There was understanding in her smile when she replied, "That sounds nice." He looked again at her lips, at the precious smile upon them. As he looked back into her eyes, their connection was once again electric and left him longing for her.

Finally, he took a deep breath and looked away. She certainly wasn't making it easy to wait! If she didn't leave soon, he would lose all of his composure and kiss her anyway. This was too important to handle casually. He figured it was one of her first kisses, if not THE first kiss and he wanted her to feel perfect about it.

"It's getting late and you have a half hour drive. Do you want to talk as you drive, to keep you awake?" And because I really don't want to let you go yet...

"Sure, if you're not too tired to talk for 30 minutes." She smiled.

Silly girl, he could talk with her all night. "I think making sure you get back safely is more important than my sleepiness." He gave her a smirk.