Chapter 7

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"What's the status of the casualties?" The Head Captain asked. Most of the captains were gathered around. Unohana walked in with a bow. "There were many, we managed to save most, unfortunately four have died. " Yamamoto looked down. "I see. Good work." Unohana nodded. Not long after Kyoraku and Jushiro walked in. Ikkaku and Kenpachi were behind, with you beside them. You kept your head low. You were ashamed. You didn't deserve to look at them. Not after what you did. All eyes focused on you. "(Y/N)-san." The Head Captain's voice boomed. Your shoulders tensed as you held back your tears. You weren't sure what to say.

"I-I'm so sorry it was all my fault. " you wailed. Kyoraku looked at you lost. "What do you mean?" he questioned. "I-I felt that hollow for weeks..but I thought it was just my nerves. It came back, w-when Ami left. I-It brought others with it...i-if I had reported it all those people would still be alive!" you sobbed. Your tears hit the floor, shoulders shaking. Jushiro finally put the pieces together. "T-That's the one we felt when we visited the academy. It was targeting you this entire time." You rubbed your eyes. "Y-You knew?" He nodded and the Head Captain sighed. "We were reckless. When they felt the disturbance it was reported. The target however was very good at masking it's presence. " you listened, eyes still red from crying.

The Head Captain walked down from his seat, moving to stand right in front of you. "It was our mistake. If I understand correctly you lead those hollows away from the area with the injured. You may not realize it child, but you saved many lives. "

"B-But I killed Ami!!" you objected. Unohana shook her head. "She's very much alive. " you turned to her in surprise.

"What.." Kyoraku nodded, wearing a guilty look. "I apologize for my poor reaction before. You were terrified, in such a situation anyone would have acted the same. You were fighting for your life. Ami-san knows as much too. The first thing she asked when she came to was if you were okay. She had just been stabbed but she was worried about your well being. She truly does care about you. " Your eyes welled up again. You brought both your hands together. "S-She's alive. Thank goodness." you weren't sure how you were going to live with yourself if she died. If you were the one to kill her.

"Even though that is the case, you cannot return to the academy. "

"W-What! N-No please sir all I ever wanted was to protect I need to be a reaper I-I have to-" he cut you off raising a hand. "You will join the Gotei 13. " your mouth fell open.

"Are you serious.." he gave a nod. "You have very powerful abilities. They are premature, but present. Those skills need to be monitored. If you have another outburst it could put many of your friends at the academy in danger. You may also be a walking target for hollows. It would be easier if you are in close proximity if you're ever attacked." you didn't know what to say. This was your dream come true. It was all you ever wanted. Yet, you felt like you didn't deserve it.

Yamamoto placed a hand on your shoulder and you looked up. "Do you know what the fire of your blade represents?" you looked at him quizzically. "N-No sir." he cracked a small smile.

"Our fire is used to protect. I protect this institute. This foundation is my responsibility. My flames represent my will to defend what I can. Your flames represent the same. If you can turn your fear into a weapon, you will make an exceptional reaper." your eyes shook at his kind words.

"I-I'm going to do my very best sir!! Thank you!!" you bowed. The reapers present watched with a smile.

"Control." That's what you needed to achieve. If you could do that, you could get through and finally fulfill your dream to protect. You never wanted to feel this way again. 

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