Something To Believe In - Jack Hughes [New Jersey Devils]

6: Kiss Me Slowly

"I just don't get it, why did he kill her?" I looked up at Jack questioningly.

His arm was draped around my shoulders and a slight smile played on his lips.

"Well he didn't want to kill her" he said with amusement in his voice.

"He didn't?" I asked confused.

"No, it was his other personality" he chuckled slightly.

"I don't think I'm following this movie as well as I thought I was" I laughed nervously.

"It's ok hun" he rubbed my arm gently with the hand that was around my shoulders. "It's a pretty dumb movie anyways" he reached for the remote as my phone rang again.

I rose an eyebrow at Jack as the same number flashed across my phone.

"Hello?" I answered the phone. "Hello? They hung up again" I closed my phone.

"They probably just dialed the wrong number again" he rubbed my knee gently before standing up and holding out a hand to me.

I looked at him confused and he laughed softly.

"Let's go to bed" he smiled with a motion of his head.

"I'm not going to keep taking up space in your bed" I laughed holding my ground as he tried to tug me away. "Sharing a bed can't be comfortable for you"

"And if I said I wanted you there?" He squatted down and met me with wide eyes.

"Why would you want me there? I'm just taking up your room" I asked seriously.

"Because I want you there" I looked up at him shocked before he spoke again. "I always want you there" he dipped his head slightly to catch my lips with his.

As much and I had wanted to kiss him in the days leading up to that point, I had never expected it to actually happen so when it did it was safe to say it took me by surprise. So much so that I had barely gotten to kiss him back before he pulled away.

"Hey, I'm sorry" he breathed looking away before standing up straight.

"No, it's just I-" I started before he cut me off.

"I know, you've been through a lot. I shouldn't have put you in that position right now. I'm just...I'll take the couch tonight please just take the bed" he looked at me seriously.

"Jack, I-"

"Goodnight"

"No" I said firmly. "This is your place and you're taking the bed, I'm sleeping on the couch, end of discussion"

"But I-"

"End. Of. Discussion" I warned getting up from the couch and walking to the bathroom.

I had blown it. After the way I had been feeling towards him and how much I wanted him to kiss me, I never thought he would be the one to make the move and I would be the one to mess it up. I took a deep breath before walking out of the bathroom.

The door to Jack's room was mostly shut and he wasn't in the living room. There was a blanket and pillow laid out on the couch for me. I clenched my eyes and took a deep breath before deciding to lay down.

I wouldn't be able to sleep, I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep. I tossed for a good half hour trying to get comfortable but the truth was that after sleeping with Jack since I arrived, I wasn't comfortable sleeping anywhere but in his arms.

This was stupid, I didn't want to be on the couch and alone. I wanted to be with Jack, I wanted his arms around me and I wanted to sleep on his chest like I had been every single night. If he kissed me, hopefully that meant he wouldn't be opposed to the idea.

I threw the blanket off me and got off the couch. I slowly made my way to the door of Jack's room. He didn't move while I slowly opened the door and closed it behind me.

Before I could overthink I pulled the covers back and slipped into bed wrapping my arms around him. As if on instinct his arms wrapped around me as he stirred.

"Is this ok?" I whispered to him.

"This is always ok" he shifted more to make us both more comfortable.

"Jack, I-"

"Shh, you don't have to say anything. I know and I'm sorry I put you in that position" he brought one hand to rub the back of my head.

"No Jack, you don't know" I brought my head up to look at him.

"What do you mean?" He asked confused.

Without answering I claimed his lips with mine, bringing one hand to the side of his face.

"You're my safe place" I breathed when I pulled away. "You've always been my safe place. I don't want to be without you, something has changed between us Jack. I don't know if you feel that"

"I feel it" he took a deep breath. "it's not fair"

"What's not fair?"

"He got to be with you for so long and all he did was hurt you. He hurt you when I would have killed to just...love you." He took another deep breath. "But you loved him"

"Hey" I brought his attention to me. "I haven't loved him in years. This right here" I laid my hand flat against his chest. "This is the most love I've felt in a long time, maybe ever"

"Bail-" he started before I stopped him.

"I was done with him a long time ago, it was done before I even knew it was done. I've tried to hide what I've been feeling lately but there's no point, I have feelings for you Jack...and I'm sorry"

"Why are you sorry? I have feelings for you too, I've had feelings for you since we were kids"

"Since we were kids? Why didn't you ever say anything?" I breathed out almost frustrated with all the wasted time.

"I thought you loved him" he looked at me seriously.

"I didn't" I barely said above a whisper.

"I know that now, I wish I knew that then"

"That doesn't matter...we're here now" I said quietly as I laid my hand against his cheek gently.

"Can I kiss you again?" He barely breathed out.

"You don't have to ask" I smiled as he leaned over and took my lips in a soft, slow kiss.

"I don't want to be without you either" he ran a hand through my hair. "I know I said I didn't want you to leave because I was worried about you, but while that's true there's more to it. I don't want you to leave because I don't think I can be without you after having you here, coming as close to this happening as I've ever been. I want you to stay for both of us. For your safety and for my weakness."

I nodded at him before kissing him slowly and softly once more. I was enjoying the slow, soft tenderness we shared in that moment. As far as I was concerned, we had the rest of our lives to be rushed, chaotic and quick.