Alice Avery
My hatred was triggered. He was right and no matter what he did I'd be there to catch him when he fell. I walked out, I couldn't be near him right now. I couldn't get through to him and it made me feel paralyzed.
By the time I got back down to my car I had tears running down my face. I was powerless, I didn't know who Ricky had become. He had no feelings, no emotions. He doesn't care that he almost killed someone. That only made me realize that I had no idea who Ricky was, I knew nothing about him.
After I calmed myself down I started my engine and started driving back to Mandy's. I stared to the back roads through my tear filled eyes.
I wasn't focused on where I was driving, I let the road lead me to wherever. I envisioned myself anywhere, anywhere but here.
The bliss didn't last long as all the drama came back into my mind within seconds. My brain was shut off but now it's turned back on and it's a negative feeling; all the thinking.
I live in reality, we all do. Reality is a painful, derogatory hell and we live it everyday. But there's these little moments, these times where we live in a euphoric state. The stress you have built up inside you is gone, all the awful reality is far, far away, it's your world and you decide what happens in it. That moment of euphoria is what makes life undeniably magical. Those moments keep us alive because without them, our living is pointless.
I drove away and tried to find my way back to Mandy's place, even when I wish I could leave everything behind I drove into the chaos. I began to think about Ricky again, he acted so cold and vile. I couldn't help but wonder, is this who he really was? Someone who failed to show remorse even when it comes to someone's possible death?
I finally got back to Mandy's and before I got out of my car Mandy was already rushing out of the house to me. "Razzle called and told me what happened," she told once I stepped out and we walked back inside.
"Trent said it was my fault." I spoke in an unfortunate tone.
I could tell by the look on her face that she pitied me. Her eyes were soft and she rubbed my back to try and comfort me as we sat on the sofa.
"It's not your fault, you know that. Trent just wants to get under your skin."
"I just hope Link wakes up." My fingered rubbed circled at my temples to hopefully remedy the headache my stress had caused.
She hesitated before she spoke again, "Did you see Ricky?"
I chuckled at the situation, "Two days ago I felt like I was on top of the world because of him. And now he's a completely different person, and I believe that person is sinister."
Mandy rolled her lips into her mouth, unsure of what to say. "Is there- is there anything I can do to help?"
I sucked in a breath, "Hope for a miracle."
"For Ricky or for Link?"
"Both," it felt wrong to say. "Ricky deserves whatever punishment comes to him, especially if Link doesn't make it. But does it make me a horrible person that I don't want him to experience any of it?"
"No," she answered. "It's called empathy Alice. You care for him and that's nothing to be ashamed of."
"I think I deserve his punishments too because even after what he's done, I still think I could love him one day."
Mandy looked at me like I had three heads, I even shocked myself with what I just exposed. One day I think I could love him but that day feels centuries away.
