After She Left

tear me apart

"Kept your beauty whole

Don't need my help to grow

But I can show that you, babe

Slow down"

Jesper Munk's "Slow Down"

He walked around the apartment block three times before he went in. Just like in Romania, he circled it to clear his head, but there was no clearing what was in there. Not when he knew he had to face whatever that package was sooner or later. He supposed he could just throw it away, but the curiousity would devour him and he knew he would fish it out of the trash.

Running his hand over his face, he knew he couldn't stall any longer. Not only was it tearing him apart, but he had to face these things. Life had thrown so much at him, and he realized that the times that were the easiest were back in World War II. He laughed wryly to himself – how the worlds worst war could be the easiest, clearest time in his life. Now that was just mean.

"No," he said to himself. The clearest time in his life was when he was living with the prettiest woman in the world, with a smile that could ignite a room, and his heart, on fire. Romania, that was the clearest time in his life. As he was putting the puzzle pieces and scraps of his mind back together, and she was there, loving him unconditionally.

Standing on the sidewalk beside his apartment, he couldn't stall any longer. In his distressed state, he didn't notice the same woman from earlier, his neighbour, appear at his side. She held a to-go cup of coffee in her hand. Her hair was up now, in two buns on either side of her head. People tended to have the weirdest styles these days, and yet Bucky couldn't help but think it suited her face. This time around, he noticed that she had a small lip ring.

"Hello again, neighbour," she announced. "I have been dwelling on what I said earlier, I feel like such a jackass."

The crassness to her words shocked Bucky into a smile. It quirked up at the side. Back in the 40's, women didn't swear. He kinda liked this.

"No, I was... I was distracted," he admitted, his heartrate started to decrease.

"Dude, I called you a dog. Like... Why am I such an idiot?" She laughed lightly, then sipped her coffee. A small droplet hung onto her silver barbell in her lip and she wiped it away with the back of her manicured hand. Her nails were long and shaped like little coffins, and painted a matte black. "Consider it my smooth way of flirting and winning over the hearts of men and women alike."

Another thing he was getting used to; blunt honesty about being one's self.

Maybe he could pick up a thing or two from her.

"Look, I've clearly left you speechless," she said with a cheeky grin. "I'm Lillian."

"Bucky," he replied. "I should, uh... I have to go inside."

"Alright," she said, raising a perfectly sculpted eyebrow ever so slightly. "See you around, Bucky. Oh, and if you ever need a running partner, I'm in apartment 12C. And like... you don't sweat, but I sweat enough for both of us. If you ask me, we're a perfect match."

Bucky was caught off-guard by her openness. She was incredibly blunt and took the reigns of the conversation, driving it with her wit. He nodded and said something generic in response, then headed into the building. He took the stairs two at a time before realizing he wasn't so sure he wanted to go inside just yet. But he had to, there was no more stalling.