Endless Darkness

Chapter 14

A/N: no I did not forget 2 days. I just skipped it. You will read it later.

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1 day

I cant wait another day.

I visit Brandon for the last time. I kiss his cheek and tell him how much I love him. I apologize over and over until I can't talk through my tears. I leave the envelope on the table next to his bed.

I head back to Koas and set the other envelope on the desk in my room. I smile knowing that everything will be solved after today. There will be no more problems.

I smile as the tears run down my cheeks. I think of all the things that have brought me to do what I am about to do. Asura and Thyra became the only people I have ever trusted and cared for but faked the entire thing. Lied to my face. Holly helped them. She had been my friend for so long. I failed my father. And my brother. I basically killed them both. It's all my fault that I now lay here in a puddle of my own blood all alone. It's my fault that I lay here bleeding out. I am not afraid of it though. I can finally go tell my father how sorry I am. I can go see him and tell him I tried. I will then greet Brandon when his time comes and tell him how sorry I am. Maybe I will rot in hell, but it's better than the nothingness I feel now. The darkness that has consumed me. It's better than being all alone.

My final thoughts flood my brain. The thoughts of how much I hate myself and everything I have done. I hate the way I look and the way I so easily kill people. I hate the way I trust way too easily. I hate the way I always manage to end up alone.

I hear pounding my vision wavers. Loud noises fill my head. It almost sounds like someone is talking.

"...darling," Koa?

I open my eyes slightly to see Koa's face. Full of worry. Tears brimming his eyes.

"Why did you do this, darling," he sounds...sad?

"I have no one. I'm all alone," I smile at him. "I can go be with my father now. I won't be alone. I can finally meet my mother too." My smile fades, "I'm alone."

"Darling, I have been here for you this whole time. Cant, you see that?" The tears fall from his eyes. It's the last sight I see before I am fully consumed by darkness. Even darker than my mind.

***

"We should kill the girl too," Josh said after shooting my father.

"No, leave her," Koa said strongly. I kept my eyes on my father. His dead body.

Josh glared at Koa. I heard someone shoot a gun. I was not paying any attention to them. I was too focused on my father. To focused on him to notice Koa save my life.

***

'The only emotion I can feel is this burning hatred for Koa.'

Something I constantly thought. I never realized he might've been doing that on purpose.

***

"Happy birthday, Nickel!" I laugh seeing that Brandon still can't pronounce my name correctly.

"Thank you, Brandon. Why don't you go to the kitchen and get a treat! I will meet you thereafter I am done talking to Koa, okay?"

I smile until he is out of sight, "How the hell did you find him?"

I was mad then. But Koa saved him from being killed in the bomb. He did that for me.

***

Memories flood my mind as I finally realize what he meant when he told me he's always been here for me. Koa coming to stay with us to be a buffer between Roberto and I. When he took me away from Roberto when I really needed to getaway. Not only at balls but he even got me out of my own home. When he showed up to help me save Brandon. He helped heal my arm when I got shot. That's only what I can think of. That's only what I've seen. What has he done that I don't know about?

I suddenly don't want to die anymore. I don't want to keep falling into this darkness that now seems inevitable. I was never truly alone, I always had Koa. But now I am going to leave him. I won't be able to thank him. I keep falling deeper and deeper. I hold onto the thought of Koa. I hold onto it until I am surrounded by darkness.

(754 words)