The Magnificent Women of Rafael Silvestre

Lie #3: Lincoln Yturralde

"TWELVE HOURS TAYO NGAYON, HA?"

That means twelve sticks for me. Obviously, I'm a chainsmoker.

"Fine. I need more information about these ladies. Family members, jobs, friends, hobbies, hindi lang ang superficial information na sinabi mo sa akin last time."

"That can come later. For now, make me come first." Yumakap naman sa akin ang lalaking matagal ko nang kilala. Si Lincoln. I can feel his schlong poking at my butt. In purpose, I'd say he did.

Who says I can't play the field? Si Rafael lang ba ang may kakayahang magkaroon ng secret affairs?

"Do not make me lose my sanity by interrupting my smoking moment, Lincoln."

He snickered. "Ang sexy mo kapag sinasabi mo ang pangalan ko, Lolli."

Umangat ang kanang kilay ko. "Lolita na lang, please. I don't want you calling me that. It sounds like I'm some cheap slut 'pag galing sa 'yo."

Kumawala ito sa pagkakayakap sa akin. "And I'm not some man-whore too, kaya 'wag mo naman akong tinatrato na parang bayaran mo lang."

"I'm doing you a favor, Lincoln," sabi ko. Well, we both are doing each other a favor upon having casual meetings like this. When I'm looking for a good fuck, I come to him. Second reason na lang ang agenda ko sa mga pinaiimbestigahan ko.

I come to him after Rafael fucks me. Para bang may ibang sense of fulfillment ito sa akin na ito na 'yong cheating moment ko kay Rafael, pero I still remain loyal to Rafael. At least to his eyes.

Lincoln and I aren't lovers. Unlike Rafael, hindi ako emotionally-attached kay Lincoln. We're just sexually involved. At least for me. But for him...

"Likewise. And I'm offering you for the longest time. Iwanan mo na ang Rafael Silvestre na 'yan. I'm just here, you know."

"Ayoko," mariing sabi ko.

"What's the reason ba? Mas malaki ba ang titi niyan sa akin kaya hindi mo maiwan? Mas matagal labasan? Mas magaling mag-brotsa? 'Tangina, tell me!" bulyaw nito.

Pinandilatan ko si Lincoln. "Language, Lincoln. 'Wag mong ipakitang galing ka sa squatter's area kung saan ka hinango ng mommy ko. Ah, well. What am I saying? As if namang maitatago ng English mo ang bahong umaalingasaw ng mga mura sa bibig mo."

He was offended dahil mariing hinatak niya ako sa braso. "At ikaw? Kinasosyal mo ang pagshi-Shit mo? Kinabango ng bunganga mo ang kawa-What the Fuck mo? Slut? Bitch? Just so you know, Lolli. Pare-parehas lang tayong kumakain ng bigas, umiinom ng tubig, umuutot, tumatae, nalilibugan, kumakantot, nilalabasan! So stop giving me the bullshit of your social status because of the language I am using. It's as irrelevant as your marriage to your husband who seeks passion and attention on his whores!"

Natawa na lang ako sa pinagsasasabi ni Lincoln. He was the epitome of realness, I would say. Kaya I admire this guy.

In fairness naman sa lalaking ito. Maabilidad, madiskarte, mautak. Scholar ito ng Mommy ko of one of her humanitarian programs during her Quezon City Hall days.

Matagal nang nagpaparamdam sa akin ito. College days pa lang. Madalas kasing i-invite ito ng Mommy sa bahay dahil ito ang tumutulong sa akin sa paggawa ng term papers, research studies, at thesis. Pero... I don't know. I didn't see him as a guy I would marry.

Nagpursige para maging isang private investigator para lang masabi na malayo ang narating sa buhay. Sterling records in and off campus, especially when he's already in the field. Impressed ang Mommy, pero withdrawn pa rin ako kay Rafael.

Kaya naman itong hookup setup namin ay ibinigay ko na sa kanya. Dito, masusuklian ko ng aking katawan ang pagmamahal na matagal na nitong gusto na ibigay ko. Lust for love, yes?

He is, indeed, a very likeable man. Guwapo, matalino, matangkad, bastos sa paraang magugustuhan mo. The well-endowed package is a bonus, actually. Pero hindi ko ito mahal.

"At least, on this part, lumamang ka kay Rafael. I'd say you're a bit thicker, longer, wetter." I went down and caressed his penis as if I'm devout of a certain icon.

"Ah, Lolita..." Lincoln moaned.

"So, ano'ng business ni Otoha?" I insinuated.

Yumuko naman si Lincoln at ibinaba ang kamay ko. Nagsuot ito ng boxer briefs nito at nahiga na lang sa kama.

I slid myself in his arms, but he turned the other way.

"Ano ba ang problema?"

"Can't I have a moment with you na hindi lang trabahador ang tingin mo sa akin? 'Wag mo namang sirain ang fantasy ko sa 'yo. 'Yon na nga lang ang mayroon ako, eh."

I lie down with a blank head. Walang pumapasok na kahit ano sa utak ko ngayon.

Nabasag ang katahimikan nang biglang bumuka ang bibig ni Lincoln. "Out of reach, so far... I never had your heart... Out of reach, couldn't see..."

"We were never meant to be?" pagtutuloy ko, na ikinasimangot nito.

Intellectual. Sexual deviant. Balladeer pa. What's not to love about this guy?

And why can't I even realize that?

"So much hurt, so much pain, takes a while to regain what is lost inside... And I hope that in time, you'll be out of my mind, and I'll be over you..."

Somehow it pains me to see him like this. Alam ko naman sa sarili ko na hindi lang ang katawan ko ang gusto niyang makuha. Pero ang nais nito ang hindi pa ako handang ibigay.

"I hope so, Lincoln."

"Oo, sana dumating 'yong araw na ikaw naman ang maghahabol sa akin. Ikaw naman 'yong magmamakaawang mahalin ako. Ikaw naman 'yong mababaliw sa kada minutong kakaisip sa 'kin sa tuwing wala ako sa tabi mo. Kasi... ang tagal ko nang gano'n sa 'yo, eh. Ang unfair lang. I've had a taste of you, but I can never have all of you. Sana talaga."

I can imagine his pain, but as selfish as I may sound, it would be excruciating if I leave Rafael. Delphi's question has been nagging me. Ano nga ba ang nangyari sa academic titles ko?