Whiter by the rain ( A Lana Del Rey FanFiction)

Not The Lucky Ones.

< Your family doesn't seems interested in talking with you > someone says.

I slowly turn my head and look up to the tall nurse standing four feet in front of me.

< I know - I mumble looking at my shoes - we're not in speaking terms .>

She gasps loudly after placing a small book on the cupboard .

< You can't go home alone - she says clearly,her voice lacking in emotions - the hospital has to make sure someone's there to look after you,and since you can't afford a private nurse... >

<It's fine- I cut off,trying to stand up without fanting - I can't take care of myself,I've been living on my own for years,plus,I've got friends > My head is spinning around and I can't totally feel my legs,biting my lips I strive to take fast steps,but an arms stops me.

<You're not fine! > the nurse looks at me in total pity as I sight out of pain but keep walking with my head up.

<Yes,I am,the doctor told me I'm free to go despite for some visits I have to do > I look up to her trying to let her see how determinated I am in not staying over.

< Okay, but please don't skip any visit and try take care of yourself > .

<I will > I dramatically lie.

Who am I kidding?I'm not capable of taking care of my life,I can't barely remember much of it,and I assure you,everything I remember isn't that good.Just cigarettes,Alcohol,and partying all the way with guys and girls,and sure as hell I'm not coming back here,I can't barely afford the medicines they're giving to me.

I'm in deep,deep:

Shit.

I try to pull back my tears,as I know that when I'm out of here,there's nowhere I can go,my family won't talk with me and my friends are all married or having the time of their lives,they won't care about a wreckage shaped girl that knocks at thei godknowswhich doors.

<Are you ready to go? > my doctor comes into the room and check on me,maybe he thinks I'm going to kill myself.

Maybe I will..

<Yes> I just mumble,trying to wear a nice smile on my face.

<Good,because there's a young man outside,waiting for you > A grin appears on my face.

Maybe is the boy I was in that car with?Maybe is the same person I'm dreaming about for nights?

<Who?> I can't wait and I don't try to hide my excitment as I quickly run down the stairs to see a red Merceds parked in front of the hospital.

<Hello?> I call out,knockin' on the door,a silent,small,tall and completly handsome man slightly turns qith a smirk on his lips.

His cigarette fastly hits the street as he places his eyes on me.

<Baby> he says,opening the main door and holding me in a thight hug,his scent,his wide shoulders and his fainted beard stings me on the cheeks,but I couldn't really care less.I know I fell in love with him the first time I saw him,and I know is still the same.

<Honey > I replay,tears storming out of my eyes.

<God,I missed you> he says,his voice rought and cracked.

<I missed you too,I-I w-woke up a-and I couldn't remembe..>

<Shh,don't say anything,we don't need it.> His arms thightly wrapped around my waist.

<I love you so much,I missed you like hell,I couldn't remember anything of this,of you,of.. >

His lips locked into my mouth,flowers growling in my stomach,his cologne scent buzzes into my nose and his whiskey smell as well.

I kiss him back,teasting every second of him,trying to satisfy the hunger that laid in my heart for days,I craved him to the top because I wasn't able to figure him out or to know If I was never ever going to see him again.

This memory makes me cringe as I step closer to his bare chest and start hugging him never wanting to get away.

<We have to leave > he says after some moments of cuddling.

<I don't want to,we could stay here forever >

Honestly I couldn't care less about being safe or in a more private space,I just want him,every inch of his skin,right now.Forever.

<We can't babydoll,we have to go back.>

<Where?> I can't remember me having a house,or his flat,memories where so confused I just have tiny memory of him and me in a car or in a big bed,but that was it,everything else we might have said or done just was faded away from my crazy mind.

<My flat,you have to start packing .> his hand lockes mine strongly but still gently pushing my frame to his car,begging me with his eyes to get in with no moping about what was going on.

I do as I'm asked to,but I can't stop thinking about his words

"You have to start packing" packing?For what?To where?

I can't remeber much of this guy,despite for some random moments or the absolute certainty of my deep love for him,but I also remember how demoralizing he could be,and how I used to have mood swings just because of his nasty words.

<To where?> I only manage to ask,his hand still glued to my hand,holding it hardly.

<Don't worry about it,love,we'll have a lazy day today> he smirks at me.

Our hands clung together.

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Just want to say,I'll upload the next chaper this very day!

Things are going to became interesting again and I just want to go to the point straight away.

Hopefully you'll enjoy!