Whiter by the rain ( A Lana Del Rey FanFiction)

Guns'N'Roses

I'm still waiting for an answer,but he looks like he doesn't care,so he grabs his new cigarette form a new white and black Malboro's packet and he puts one into his mouth,taking his fluo lighter and he lights up the cigarette smoking the smoke out of his mouth with a sexy and nasty geasture.

I stare him hoping for an answer but the only thing that he does is turning on the car and going back to NYC.He doesn't say anything for all the journey and I don't want to watch at him,I'm not a weirdo and I'm not weak and I know hot to talk to someone but with him every single attempt seems like useless,I don't want to cry but I can't help it.

I wip the first tear which flows down my cheeck,I turn myself back to the window looking to the landscape,I don't want hm to hurt him,but I must admit that all this mystery all this dark around us is attrctive it scares me but I love danger.

When we arrive he get out the car and walk without watching back to me,I do the same

< If you love me too met me at the pale moonlight > I know he knows.

If you lived in the Bronx once in you lifetime you must know about The Pale Moonlight.

I's a club,It's placed at the end of an old forsaken road and it's very very dirty,but the bestest mind of my generation have passed by there,musicists,violinist,guitarist,singers,actors,they're all there.

It's an retrò place it seems like it stopped in the '50. He doesn't say anything but I know he knows.

Nightime.

I'm here in the "backstage" of the stage which is anin't but an old basement with lots of ditches all around me and an old red faded fry curtain.I'm waiting standing lying my back to the wall and I'm listening to two actors who are improvising a sketch.When I hear some claps of hands I let my cigarette fall on the ground I squeeze it with my left foot and I move on,I let my hair lie all over my face and I look at the ground grabbing my hands,when I hear my name with some whistles coming form old alcoholic men I now  the ball is on my court.

I arrive on the stage and I start singing an old blues song I wrote several years ago,it talks about pain and love and a rotten relationship. I walk on the stage like if I'm marking my own territory and I gently move on it like a red carpet darling,I can feel bikers bones swinging on their bodies because they want more more and more.They want me,they want to ride my skin and make it theirs,but just one of those persons has got the permission and I can feel his cologne perfume flying in the air fascinating and violently and I love it,I couldn't love it more.When I get slowly my keens down shouts rise on the room like if I was a stripper I should be ashamed of it I know but it just that I like it,It makes me feel alive.

After the show I move away the red curtain and I crawl on the floor looking for the main door,when I find it I have to push strongly because of the rust around the handle,when I finally get out of the place,here he is,standing in front of me with his ruffled hair and his cigarette aside his mouth hanging sexily,he puts an hand thought his hair and he smile at me with a crooked smile.He it is,my favourite kind of guy. He grabs my hips and make me get closer to him,kissing me softly I can smell the vodka from his mouth it's disgusting but also must say I don't mind.

<Soo,what? > I say smiling at him

<Well,I love you voice but not really the song > he makes a funny face and make fun of me

<Oh c'mon!I know you loved it!>

<You're wrong,I didn't love it -He becomes suddnly serious -I loved you > It goes straight to my heart,but I want to know more,I want to know that he loves me now and forever.

<Well,you did?> I question raising my eyebrow

He stares at me opening his arms and watching like if he doesn't know what's wrong.

<I guess I'll have to come back when you'll love me in the present> Saying it I walk slowley away,enjoying the first rain's drops.But I can heat his tiptoes coming towars me and reaching me,he grabs my hand and move my body towars his torso

<I loved you,I've been loving you,I used to love you,I'd love you,I can love you ...> he syas gasping on my neck

<I don't need an English Grammar lesson,sir> I answer tryin' to make my voice strict even if I'm dying from laughing

<So,you don't want to heart the most importan tense >

<Which is??> I answer smirking.

<You'll find out > He kisses me against my will and pull me back,then slowely he walks away.I start running and I wrap my hands on his eyes

<I want to know it now! I have no time left,sir!> I say trying to capture his attention

<I love you> He says this,like it was the easiest thing to say,you know like when you're walking on the street and you say "Hi" or " 'Morning " ,I' stand petrified wordless and breathless. And then I kiss him kindly and passionatly too under the pouring rain.