Only His

Cнаpтёя Fѳятч-Fїѵё

Aliyah

There is slight triggering content ahead, SA, so please do be warned 

My wrist ached and I massaged them, that didn't seem to help at all. I could still feel his hands wrapped around my wrist.

I stared at the bottle of alcohol next to me and I couldn't even drink it. My stomach twinged in a weird way when I thought of drinking it.

I felt extremely hot and sat outside in the cold. I didn't have anything besides a shirt and leggings. I was freezing, but I didn't want to go back inside.

Everyone looked at the mess. Then me. The way they looked at me and I hated it so fucking much.

My heart pulled for the feeling of my mother and her soft voice. I felt like my body was going to explode into bits and pieces. The snow started to fall and I looked up at the sky.

I should have just told him when I had the chance. Grey clouds covered the night sky shielding the beauty of the stars and moon from me.

I thought back to Azura and Kazimir. I broke out into another sob and just hugged myself. I was alone once again and couldn't do anything. Maybe this was my sign.

I held my chest as I rocked my body. Fuck it hurt so much. It was my fault after all. It was my fault my mom died in the end. If I just decided not to remember I needed last-minute stuff from the shop that night.

She would have been here now. I should have been more responsible as a fourteen-year-old. I felt like I was stuck in the body of a fourteen-year-old me.

Alya started to distance herself from me and started to lie to Dad, about the smallest things. I wasn't even the goddamn liar, she was. When Kazimir grabbed me and said those words. I remembered everything from the smallest details.

The smashing of plates and glass. The clashing of cutlery. The sound of Hakeem's crying, my crying, just everything.

~~~

"I told you to do one thing? How hard is it to get me a bottle of beer?" He sneers.

"I'm sorry," I mutter.

He grabs my shirt and his hands hitting me against my face. My face stinging and my tears falling out of my eyes. The ringing in my ears and not being able to do anything.

"You just have to be more of a disappointment," he spat.

"There's no more, you finished them," I cry.

"Use that goddamn brain and go buy more."

He lets go of my shirt and shoved me away. I hit the side of the counter and gripped my sides. I just looked up at him and didn't say anything. I couldn't do anything.

Alya stood watching me and I wanted her to help me, but she didn't. I stood up and ignored the pain I felt. I opened the cabinet with the painkillers. I popped three of the pills out and got some water to take them with.

~~~

There were so many other times that the beating were worse. I had gotten eighty percent on a science test. I wasn't able to study since I had to take care of Hakeem and made sure dad wasn't going to beat me. I would study during the night trying my best to keep my grades up, but I couldn't.

I was trying my best to avoid getting hit at this point. I would stay silent and move around quietly. It didn't really matter I would still get beat.

He was always yelling at me for being so stupid and insolent. For being a pathetic and useless daughter. A good-for-nothing piece of shit. It was even my fault for causing Mom's pregnancy to be difficult.