Bloodsport

chapter 29

The tile floor in the bathroom was cold. It felt like ice seeped into Harry’s skin as he pressed his face to it. It moved like water, pushing its way through in a slow but formidable fashion. The cold was dense. It made his body heavy, keeping him down against the floor. He wanted to stay there. The cold made it feel easier not to think in spirals. He inhaled, exhaled. Inhaled, and exhaled.

It was out there, in the open. Louis knew, obviously, and so did Zayn. However, with Harry’s family, it was another matter entirely. He had never known his family to be homophobic, but he also knew people reacted differently when it came to their own children. It would indubitably be a shock either way.

He’d seen his mother’s face when he met her in the hallway. He had walked past her, and he had regretted every second of what happened on the pavement. How could he have done something so stupid? He wondered if his mother was calling his father at this very second. Or maybe she was bombarding Gemma with questions? Maybe she was trying to find out who Louis was? Perhaps she was still standing downstairs in pure shock.

Harry’s whole face felt like crystal ice. He liked it.

When Zayn arrived and walked into the bathroom, he was quiet. He slid down onto the floor and pressed his palm onto Harry’s back. The hand was warm, and it made him shiver.

“She was gone when I walked in.”

Okay. Harry inhaled. Exhaled.

“Nobody’s home, mate.”

Okay. Inhale, exhale.

Zayn’s hand rubbed soothingly against his back. Harry could only see his green socks. They had the Hulk on them. Harry focused on the cold tiles, Zayn’s hand, and the purple trousers that the Hulk wore.

“She just needs a second to take it in.”

“Uh-huh.”

“You’re her child. She just needs to adjust her dreams of your future a little bit. She’ll calm down.”

“Uh-huh.”

A few minutes passed. Harry’s head swirled like he was drunk and had just lied down.

“Do you want to hear something funny?”

“No.”

For a few seconds, Zayn was silent. Then he asked, “Do you want some of that molly…?”

He wasn’t sure if it had been a good idea, to take the ecstasy. He had done drugs before, but not often, and he didn’t actually know if he liked it or not. He’d spent the night at Zayn’s house, he knew that, but he found he couldn’t recall much of the evening. He could account for about half of the night, he believed. He remembered feeling lighter, remembered Zayn making him laugh, the two of them sitting on the floor in his bedroom. He remembered not feeling nauseated at the thought of his mother seeing what she’d seen. He also recalled talking. A lot. He’d talked Zayn’s ear off. About Louis. About his eyes, his face, and probably how good he looked naked, too. Zayn promised he hadn’t done or said anything stupid, and forced him to hydrate the whole day after. At the time it had been a relief to take the molly, but a couple of days later he still got random chills.

He walked back into his house the day after he’d snogged Louis right in front of his mother. She hadn’t been home. His father was there, but he showed no indication of anything having changed. Harry had snuck straight to his room and closed the door, heart racing. Gemma hadn’t called, which meant that she probably hadn’t found out, either. It meant his mother hadn’t told anyone. He didn’t know if that was good or bad. She definitely hadn’t been home since the day before.