Speak Out

speaking in lemon invisible ink

"I really don't care what anyone says, saying hi is soo overrated! " I mustered up the most annoyed expression I've ever known.

Heta raised up her eyebrow in question as if to say 'what else is new', greeting the room with a retired sigh. "How else do you begin a conversation without a greeting, without knowing you're talking to a certain person?"

"I'll poke them with these blackened hot fingers of course" My fingers waggled smugly. I loved to stand out by doing the exact opposite of what most did. By never getting manicured! By exposing my fingers to the dishwashing liquid and onion and garlic and shallots. And you'd be surprised to hear how many of our clients pour out asking me if I'm fine. Hilarious.

"What if someone sue you for molest? Poking without permission in their personal space?" Heta's voice rose even more than before. Her straight black bangs covered her eyes, yet I knew they could be translated to a cross eye face in emoticon language. She was my bestie after all.

I gave a sheepish smile rubbing the back of my neck. "One of the reasons I like you Heta is just this. Quite refreshing to hear questions that I haven't thought of earlier"

A slight smile almost crept on her face but soon got replaced as she dunk in immense paperwork.

"And yet I still think..." I let out a grunt as I lifted myself upward, gripping the door edge tight. "its... overrated."

It took her a while to look up. A slight concern creased shadowed her forehead. "You're telling me you're actually doing a pull up over the door. Without gloves too? Are you planning to add blisters to your assorted collection?"

By the time she asked I've completed two more reps of pull ups and sadly gave into the lactic acid protest of my straw arms. "Aye, now clients have more questions to ask – am I ok, why no manicure and why there's blisters. I know how to garner people's attention" A wink left before I could even think twice.
I heard Heta clicking tongue shaking her head. Rivulets of sweat strip teased through my chunk of hair down the side of my ears as I hobbled onto the seat nearby.

I get back to the original topic. "I mean there are so many other ways like maybe a smile in their direction? Or fire away questions straight away? What's so bad about plunging into meaningful talk than waste time on trivialities like hi and how are you's for the sake of etiquette? "

"hoi polloi doesn't find it hackneyed as you do, has heresy taken the form of flesh as you?"

"Wait—"

"What?"

"I can only answer if you tell me the meanings of heresy.. uh.. hackneyed ... and what was it? Hoi Ahoy? Some sailor language?"

"Exactly my point. Your firing away of question would be alien-ish to common folks who expect a simple hi or whatever because that's manners." A dimple stood out as she demonstrated her point.

Its moments like these I wished when time would slow down. Heta doesn't know the effect she has on me yet—her wittiness, her questions, her guffaws, her vocab, her shaking head, her dimple...It's times like these I wish I hadn't fallen for my best friend but we gotta move on.

She has a son almost my age. She is almost older than my mum. Yet I've never seen a woman like her before. She reaps things. . . magical things from the little that's there with her. If that's not magic what else is? ". . . uh come again?"

She shook her head, smiling. "Never mind that, how are you actually doing?"

Why did I imagine her patting my head. . . You know just how like cats are petted?

"Uh in purrpetual woes just as always" I shrugged.

And then it striked me, did I just purr as well? Slowly my cheeks heated up which apparently Heta took as a cue for something else.

"Oh really? You said something but your face said the opposite." She stretched a toothy grin. "Who is the gal?" She actually waggled her eyebrows. I think my heart stopped. Heta has never done that EVER. How could her man not seen that and left?

"Someone. . . I've known for long but. . ." I couldn't get my words out. I open my mouth but my throat gets clogged with uncertainty and overthinking thoughts and what ifs. I closed my eyes. Everything suddenly became too bright. I hoped I don't sound guttural. Hells.

"Atleast tell her though, the least you could do." She nodded to herself , trying not to mind my exe.crash mind.

"She already doesn't want. She prefers to be content as right now with our current level of proximity"

"But how would you know if you haven't addressed this whole thing to her?"

"I. . ." My head sunk onto the floor. 

word count : 831 
A/N
half the time i cant believe im writing it but i also cant help wonder how one would be in a situation like it 0.0