Don't regret this

13. Pepi's pov/the bar

23:00.

I'm in one of the best clubs of Bercelona with a glass of vodka in my hands.

Great music, great club, pretty girls, I'm with my bestfriend.

Yet I am the only one here who looks so depressed.

We have been here for 20 minutes but all I did was ordering shots of vodka and sit here. Gavi stopped dancing with girls to come sit next to me.

"Are you drinking it ?"

"..."

Since I didn't answer, Gavi reached to take the glass of my hands, but I drinked it in one shot before he could do it.

"Why do you look so sad Pepi ? You're ruining my mood ! Come dance with girls. It will make you cheer up !"

"I don't want to. You go dance with them."

"It's because of you that I'm not !"

I took out my phone and went in my galery to show him the picture I took in the library.

"Look what I saw in the library."

Gavi leaned to read what I wrote and then kicked my arm with his fist.

"Signed by Gavi my ass ! You wrote this !"

"The library's wall only speaks the truth..."

"Ass." He said while looking elsewhere, then brought back his attention to me.

"When did you even go to the library ? You hate people taking videos of you and treating you like an animal in some zoo so much, but you went to a place with so many people ??"

"I felt like reading a book."

"Mhm, I see. You felt like reading a book the same way you feel like going to that same café twice a week disguised from head to toe ? The first time I saw that huge scarf, jacket and glasses on you I laughed so bad."

What now ?

"You knew about this ?"

"We all know about this, man. You always go there before or after our trainings and come back with as much clothes as a clown."

"How will you do now that the weather isn't as cold as before ? Will you wear a fake moustache like in cartoons ?"

I know he finds himself very funny.

"Shut up... I fucked up, Gav. I fucked up big time."

"About what ?"

"More like about who." I mumbled.

"I never saw you so depressed about a friend or family, so..."

"Wow... did our 'I never had a girlfriend before, I want to focus on my career and I don't want to date girls right now' Pepi likes a  girl ? Pepi has a cruuuush ?"

I already regret telling him, but this secret starts to become too much to bear without anyone knowing.

"Who is she ? Do I know her ?"

"I will talk about her, you listen and give me advice, got it ? Nothing more. I won't tell you anything about her."

"Tsk. You're no fun. Fine. What happened with mystery girl ?"

"...She doesn't know I'm who I am. We talked often, and little things happened. Long story short I like her, she likes 'me' and now we are something that seems like dating. But I am sure if she learns who I am she will hate me. And that scares me to death."

"Wait wait wait. Do you see her in your café or library or somewhere ? Damn, I knew you dressed up so that people can't recognize you since you hate it a lot, but even your supposed girlfriend doesn't know you're Pepi ? Man what the fuck."

"It's just... I like the way she treats me."

"The way she talks to me and the way she talks to pedri isn't the same. I don't want to lose what I have with her."

"It wasn't important when I liked her. But I didn't think she would like 'that guy' back ! Damn it."

I drank my second shot of vodka.

"Now that she is dating 'him'... if I tell her I'm Pedri, a player she admired, and lied to her about everything, I will lose her. She will hate me. She will be so disappointed, she will think she is a joke to me !"

I hid my face in my hands. "I screwed up Gavi, every minute I spend with her worsens my case.

"...let me get this straight. You have a crush on a girl, she doesn't know you are Pedri. She likes you. You two are dating. She still doesn't know who her boyfriend is- and I assume she never saw your face- and now you are too scared to tell her the truth."

I nodded slightly.

"I don't know wich is worse. You acting so stupidly or the girl dating a guy she never saw the face to."

Gavi put his hand on my shoulder and looked at me with a serious gaze.

"You know that girls who likes a guy turn into stalkers, right ? I don't even give you 2 days before she gives you physical proof that you have been bullshitting her. Hell, I am 100% sure she will guess sooner or later who you are."

I can feel it in my guts that this girl will be the end of me. It won't be pretty.

"I don't know what to tell you Pepi. You fucked up. Even if I told you 'tell her the truth before it's too late' you will not do it so I might as well get drunk and dance."

"And I would apreciate you doing it with me, right now you look depressing."

My friend- who gave me half assed advice got back up and started to leave.

"If you hate fame and crave for an anonymous life so much, you should never have become a football player."

I drank my third shot of vodka.

I know.