Absolute Contamination

10/ Parting Ways

CHAPTER 10: PARTING WAYS

Defeated and feeling utterly miserable, I realized how I had to go back. If it hadn’t been for Emily and Hunter’s probably dead body by now that I had abandoned, I would’ve stayed in that exact same spot forever. Other than Emily, there wasn’t going to be anyone who needed me, not anymore. Perhaps the disease would take me– something I no longer cared about.

I dragged myself forward, one small step at a time, each new step becoming harder than the previous one. My legs were tired, my head hurt, and all I really wanted to do was to curl up into a ball and cry. There was no way I was going to get through this on my own, not in a million years. Mom had always been there, and when there were things I couldn’t tell her, it was Hunter who comforted me. How was I supposed to keep going without him? This wasn’t a world anymore for a sixteen year old girl to walk the streets by herself. I had always relied on Jason and Hunter to protect me and now…I’d have to watch my own back. Not just that, I still had Emily to look after as well, and that was something that looked like an impossible task at the moment. How were you supposed to look after someone else when you were a complete mess yourself?

Before I was fully aware of it, I had walked all the way back and Hunter and Emily came back into view. The sight of Hunter’s motionless body on the ground made my heart stop. Furious at myself because I hadn’t been there for him while he died, I had a hard time holding back the angry tears that threatened to spill. I would never forgive myself for letting this happen. Wave after wave of regret and guilt washed over me at the sight, and the mere thought, of my dead brother.

As I moved closer, I noticed that Emily held his hand in hers as she sat next to him. Not just that, she was talking to him. I still wasn’t close enough to hear what she was saying, but suddenly my hopes raised and I fastened my pace. Could it be that he wasn’t dead, yet?

The moment I reached them, I dropped down on my knees next to Hunter, taking a firm hold of his other hand. Relief washed through me as he opened his eyes and an ever so faint smile tucked at the corners of his mouth. He was still alive, alive and breathing.

“Thank God!” I smiled happily, because all the way back I had expected to find a waiting Emily next to his dead body, but here he was, still breathing. ­­­

 “He’s tired,” said Emily while looking up at me, “but he didn’t want to sleep before you were back. I told him that was a stupid idea.”

It was hard for me not to burst into tears again as she said that. If only that were the truth, that he was tired and simply needed some sleep, then he’d still be here in the morning, but I knew that wasn’t going to happen. It showed in his features that he wouldn’t be able to stay with us for much longer, and that was part of a reality I didn’t want to face.

“Mom says you have to sleep when you’re tired, even if it’s only a nap.” Emily continued in her bubbly way, oblivious to the severity of what was going on.

I wasn’t able to come up with any coherent words as my mind went haywire, thinking of how there was nothing I could do to help Hunter, let alone come up with something useful to say. How was I supposed to comfort him? What was the right thing to say? There were so many things I wanted to say, yet, I knew I wouldn’t have enough time to say it all.

“I sang for him, like my mom always does when I can’t sleep.” Emily smiled proudly because she was able to do the same things as her mom. “And when I’m afraid, she holds my hand until I fall asleep.”

“That’s, uhm…really nice of you.” I tried to smile back, but none of the muscles in my face wanted to cooperate. My answer lacked every bit of emotion because I couldn’t show anything even remotely close to happiness, for there wasn’t anything good about the situation. And as for anger or sadness, I had been trying so hard to suppress those feelings in Emily’s company that, even now, I couldn’t let them surface easy like that.