Old Beats | Gojo Satoru x Reader

XX

"Suguru thinks I'd follow you because he believes I'm in love with you. And he's right."

For a moment, after hearing Satoru's words, all the strength left your body entirely. With your wrists in his hands, too close to one another, your body had turned into jelly.

"What are you talking about..." you murmured, unable to look away from those blue eyes.

How could Gojo love you like that? If it were true, how could you not have noticed all this time? Instead of answers, Satoru had only raised more questions.

A spark of clarity crossed your friend's eyes, and he instantly let go of your arms as if they had burned him.

"How could Suguru know that?" you asked, completely lost. "Have you talked to him too?"

Gojo let out a hoarse laugh, looking at the ground and fiddling with his glasses in his hands.

"No," he replied. "I've been in love with you for about ten years."

A shiver ran down your spine upon hearing those words, and you straightened up in your seat. Gojo made a noise that seemed like a cross between a laugh and a sigh, and tilted his head to glance at you sideways, with a half-smile on his lips.

"Suguru was here, he's always known."

You swallowed hard and shook your head.

You had tried, but you couldn't imagine Gojo being in love with you all this time. He cared for you, that was for sure. But he couldn't care for you more than he would for a close friend; that was far beyond the narrative you had told yourself all these years.

"It can't be," you whispered more to yourself. "You just want to convince me to stay."

Gojo burst into laughter and stood up. If he had to be honest, it was somewhat comforting that you didn't believe him. All this time, he had always feared that you knew and, out of politeness or, worse, out of pity, pretended not to notice.

"Do I need to convince you?" Gojo laughed, pacing erratically around the room. He had put his sunglasses back on. "Alright, listen carefully because I'm not going to repeat this. I'm not going to make a fool of myself like this twice."

He took a deep breath and turned to face you, and you thought that, at that moment, you would have preferred to see his eyes.

"I've spent ten years avoiding even accidentally touching your hand because the slightest contact with you drives me crazy," he let out another laugh that made him seem insane. "The other day, when you had been drinking and you threw yourself on me..."

"Ugh, stop it..." you warned him, covering your face with your hands in embarrassment.

Gojo crouched in front of you and forced you to lower your hands to your lap. You still couldn't look him in the eyes, but at this distance, all he could see was your face.

"Y/n, if I didn't kiss you at that moment, it's because you had been drinking," Gojo continued to smile like a madman. "But I haven't been able to stop thinking about kissing you every single day of my life since we were fifteen. And believe me, I've tried, but I've never been able to think of anyone else but you. You have no idea what you do to me."

"But it's not true," you protested, unable to process his words. "The other day we talked about it. You did think about other people, you slept with Mei Mei."

Gojo burst into another fit of laughter and squatted in front of you, resting his elbows on his thighs.

"My thing with Mei Mei was just out of spite," he said. "Because that night you rejected me."

Surprise surfaced on your face again, and you were left with your mouth open for a moment.

"I didn't reject you! How could I...? I didn't..." you protested, unable to find the right words. Gojo raised his eyebrows, and for a moment, you saw a bluish glint. "We just argued!"

"I told you I loved you, and you replied, 'leave me alone,' but it doesn't matter anymore," he quickly retorted and added, "Do you want to know how it was?"

You were going to respond with a resounding "no," but he didn't give you the chance.

"I called her by your name."

You closed your eyes tightly. You would have almost liked to know that information if it weren't for the unpleasant images that appeared in your head from that day.

"Satoru..." you said his name like a lament without really knowing why. All you could feel was the rapid pounding of your heart in your temple, but his touch brought you back to reality. In front of you, Gojo, kneeling on his heels, had wrapped his hand around your leg at the calf. His fingers dug firmly into your muscle, and he gently shook you to regain your attention.

"I called her by your name," he repeated. "And I haven't been with anyone else all these years because I know the same thing would happen again, because the only thing I can't do is get your name out of my head."

Gojo was barely aware of what he was doing. Drunk with sincerity, he could only let out everything that crossed his mind before it was too late and he lost you forever. He was also not fully aware of the signals your body was emitting at that moment, but his instinct was picking them up. Rapid heartbeat, slightly parted lips, quickened breathing, dilated pupils.

Could it be that...?

Gojo's smile widened.

"And now I'm telling you, and I'm serious, that I would join a cult with our traitor friend, that I'd be an accomplice in the extermination of non-sorcerers, just to prevent you from leaving me behind."

Your pupils dilated, and Gojo's insides twisted at the thought that you were in that state, so undone, because of him, his words, his confession.

"I just ask you not to go with Suguru because I don't plan to execute you," he murmured, moving his other hand up your leg, pulling you toward him, lost in a trance from his words.

"I promise I won't mention any of this again," he added, increasing the strength of his grip, drawing closer to you. "We can pretend I never said anything, I'll try to move on. If you ask me to, I'll pretend it never happened."

No. You didn't want that.

You tilted your head imperceptibly, shaking it, and Gojo smiled again, shortening the distance between you even more. Just a little more, and your noses would touch. You wanted to sigh deeply, but you were afraid that your breath would graze his face. Instead, you grabbed his sunglasses and lifted them over his head, losing yourself in his gaze.

"I just ask you, please, don't do it," Gojo whispered against you, and instinctively you brought his face a little closer to you. Immediately, he responded in the same way, approaching you until there was no distance left at all. When he spoke again, he did so against your lips, brushing them with his own. "Don't go."

Your lips fit together perfectly, as if they were created solely to kiss each other, and Gojo's breath trembled above you, contrasting with the softness of his movements. Your chest fluttered as he pulled you closer to him, carefully, as if he were afraid to break you.

Your breaths vibrated with the tension of years, and your hand climbed up the nape of his neck, fingers sinking into the soft strands of white hair, seeking an anchor in this world.

After a moment that seemed eternal, you pulled away slightly, resting your forehead on his and keeping your eyes fixed on his lips, more beautiful now that you knew they were yours.

"I love you, Satoru," you whispered against them.

Gojo let out a growl, and his lips collided with yours again, with something that could only be described as desperation. You closed your eyes tightly and allowed yourself to be swept away by the urgency of his kiss, intoxicated by his scent, undone in his arms.

Gojo gripped your waist firmly, and one of his hands climbed up your back, pressing you against his body with force, as if wanting to eliminate any space that separated you completely, as if any contact with your body was insufficient. He wanted you closer, stronger, whole, just for him.

"I love you," he whispered between kisses. "I love you."