Two for One

Chapter 6: Neighbours

"Death," Harry murmurs, staring up at the ceiling. "Is there a way to bring someone forward in time?"

Death leans over the couch's backrest and peers down at Harry, his vulture form casting strange shadows. "Not with your petty magic, but my power is infinite."

Harry purses his lips. "What do you think about adding Grindelwald? It could backfire spectacularly, but I'm just wondering since the plan is still being set out..."

Death raises an eyebrow. "Whatever you wish."

Harry hums and Death fades from existence.

If Harry's getting two then they won't be the same age, Harry promises to himself, because if one ends up broken still, he'll focus on the other and hopefully they won't go rotten at the same time.

Though there is a problem with Grindelwald since the boy has an actual family. Hopefully they don't love him, because that would make Harry's life much more difficult. Either way, removing the boy from the environment he grew up to be Dark Lord in can only get better results, right?

Harry really should study child psychology before he does something irreversible. Most conditioning that he's planning is logical and simple; get the Dark Lords to love someone who loves them back, encourage helping others, promote all the good thoughts and ignore the bad until the bad hopefully dies under the good.

A knock at the door shakes Harry out of his thoughts and he sits up, wondering who it is. Honestly, his first instinct is to get his wand for defence, but he stifles it enough that he only pockets the wand instead of clutching it in his hand. There's no one in this time who wants to hurt him.

Harry unlocks and opens the door only to encounter a couple, maybe early thirties, who smile widely and offer up a plate of treacle tart. Well, Harry is certainly not going to say no to treacle tart.

"Hi!" the woman chirps. "We're your neighbours, just to the left. I'm Rachel."

"And I'm Bradley," the man chimes in before he holds up the plate a bit higher. "We've come with an offering of friendship."

The couple spend a moment easily laughing together at the words, their mannerisms a clear indication that they do this a lot. The woman threads an arm through the man's and they lean against each other with bright smiles.

Harry instantly decides that these people should be Tom's parents because they're cavity-causing sweet to each other. Not even Ron and Hermione, at their peak, were this bad.

"Come in," Harry says quickly, stepping back and holding the door open. "I'm Harry, just moved here from Surrey." He takes the plate and guides them to the living room where they take seats. "Does anyone want some tea, coffee?"

"Oh, no thanks," Rachel declines. "This is just a quick stop, we can't leave the house for too long."

Harry lights up. "Do you have kids at home?"

"No, no," Bradley chuckles. "We've just left a chicken in the oven." He glances over at Rachel with hearts in his eyes. "Though we have been thinking about a child for a while now."

"Are you going with adoption?" Harry slides in there, probably not as subtle as he thinks he is since he's just a bit too pumped for it not to show in his voice.

Rachel shrugs. "It is an option," she admits kindly, most likely not wanting to immediately shoot the idea down.

That's fine, Harry has a few years to convince them.

"Sorry, I think I came on a bit too strong," Harry says sheepishly. "I just kind of feel pretty passionate about adopting since I was an orphan."

Yes, Harry is playing the orphan card to manipulate them, and he has no shame.

"Goodness, that's awful," Bradley gasps. The couple immediately look at Harry with pity and Bradley not so subtly slides the treacle tart plate closer to try and comfort him.

"It wasn't so bad," Harry reassures them, lying through his teeth. The Dursleys were pretty shit. "I was adopted by a wonderful couple who loved me like their own son."

Rachel leans across and pats Harry on the arm. "They must be amazing people," she says fervently and even seems to tear up a little.

"They are," Harry states, thinking of Arthur and Molly instead. He wonders how everyone is doing now that Harry is gone. He hopes they're not sad, because even if Harry had properly died, he still went out surrounded by family. He honestly can't think of a better way to die.

"But enough about that," Harry says before the mood drops too low. "What's this neighbourhood like?"

"It's rather quiet," Bradley explains in a soft voice as if he'd startle Harry away if he spoke too loudly. "This is an aged area so most of the families have kids who are already adults."

"It's lovely here," Rachel takes over. "The park is gorgeous and there's the best bakery in the world just a five minute walk away."

Bradley nods enthusiastically, having bounced back from the orphan trap card. "When you have the time we can take you around on a tour; show you all the best spots and introduce you to the others."

"Sounds great." Harry smiles widely.

They even suggest a general date for it and start talking about the other families around here. Harry isn't doing it deliberately, but the information goes in one ear and straight out the other. He hopes there isn't a quiz at the end.

Harry also quickly realises that they both tend to keep talking if you let them, which is good for him because all of his cute stories about friends involve magic and life-threatening situations. So he slowly goes through the treacle tart, occasionally humming or nodding.

Bradley notices the time first and they say a panicked goodbye because the chicken is still in the oven. Harry waves them off and closes the door with a wide grin on his face.

This couple seems to have just stepped out of his imagination, already fully formed as the perfect neighbours and best candidates for Tom's parents. It's like the universe is throwing itself into making sure that Harry has the easiest time of things. Clearly, this is meant to be.

Everything is going perfectly.