Two for One

Chapter 10: Pets

It goes as well as can be expected, really.

They fall into an easy pattern, Harry constantly with them those first few weeks, answering any questions they have and simply being there to make his presence a known one in their minds. He doesn't want them to close off, thinking that they can't rely on other people to help them.

He takes them everywhere with him and stays completely open about what he's doing and what he wants and his entire thought process. Maybe if he'll rub off on them, but it's mostly so they'll understand how a normal person thinks.

The unfortunate thing is that both of the boys are really too smart for Harry's own good. Because Harry is projecting his thought process aloud, they've become terrifying little mind readers when they put the effort in.

Harry will wander into the living room where Gellert is practicing spells, trying to find his favourite tea cup, and without even looking at Harry Gellert will direct him to the library where he last left his cup.

The mind reading also comes in handy when the boys want to cause trouble. They know where Harry will look first so when Tom escapes into Knockturn Harry will never find the boy until Tom has finished whatever it is he does down there.

Someone is probably dead.

Death says Harry is being dramatic, but the last time Death said that Gellert blew a hole through the wall, so Death doesn't get to have an opinion anymore.

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Gellert shoves a puppy into Harry's face. "Can I keep it?"

"Well, that depends," Harry muses, relaxing at an outdoor café in Diagon because the boys ditched him half an hour ago. "Who did you steal it from?"

"I found it," the blond says earnestly.

"And where did you find it exactly?"

Gellert seems to contemplate this and decides to take a different approach. "It's injured. Someone was treating it badly."

Harry purses his lips. "We could give it to a pet shop."

"The pet shop was the one treating it badly."

"So you didn't just find it!" Harry crows in victory.

"Haaaa-ryyyyy~"

Aw, Gellert is so cute when he manipulates Harry by mimicking other children he sees during mandatory playground visits.

"I don't like it when you play pretend," Harry begins. "But I do like it when you put effort into making me happy. We can keep the dog."

Gellert hesitates. "Yes. The dog."

Harry stares. "What are you holding?"

"I'll find Tom."

"Gellert!" Harry calls after the quickly retreating boy. "Gellert, what is that thing?!"

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"Merlin, no," Harry states.

"Gellert got a puppy!" Tom argues.

"You are holding like seventeen snakes, Tom. Please explain to me what your version of equivalent exchange is."

Tom squints. "My snakes ... are the same mass as the-"

"No," Harry says again. "You get one. Those are magical snakes -that you probably stole-"

"I found them-"

"Do you know how big they get? We live in a muggle neighbourhood, how are you going to hide that?"

Tom blinks. "I will. Love you more. If you give in to my demands?"

"That's cute," Harry allows. "Still not a good argument."

Tom gets the snakes anyway. Harry ends up tripping over one at least every day. There's a real tiny one who hides in his shoes all the time.

Pets are good for children, right? Teaches responsibility and ... and Harry is a weak, pathetic thing.

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"So," the Unspeakable begins. "Which of these two is the Dark Lord?"

Harry splutters and lunges forward, grabbing the Unspeakable and dragging him away from the two confused boys.

They go out into the backyard for privacy and see the pet dog Gellert brought back splayed out in the grass, which is really looking a lot like a wolf if Harry had to pick out the species.

"Let me guess, the wolf is called Mooney?" the Unspeakable jokes.

Harry says nothing.

The silence stretches.

The cloaked figure sighs heavily. "I just feel sorry for you."

Harry scowls. "I enjoy these little conversations of ours."