Chapter 1 : Hasty Mornings and Warm Comfort

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A new Beginning? I hope so. Safe? Definitely not, but... Let the adventure begin!


"Hurry up Imani, come down for breakfast. I'll take you to the office by myself."

"You can do it, you know you can do it. It's the same thing you usually do, just in a more professional setting. Calm down, woman!"

But no. No matter how much I tried to tell myself that, neither would my hands stop shaking nor would my legs agree to walk me out of my room so I could hurry. As it turns out, giving myself a pep talk in the mirror does not help me when I'm this stressed. 

God, I miss my warm bed. Why can't I just crawl back inside and hide there for the whole day, that would definitely feel nice.

"Running back to bed?" The second I looked towards my bed, my bedroom door opened and my baba's gentle voice stopped any further action. A minute late and he would not have been able to coax me out of the blanket.

"Psst, why would you say that? I was just getting my phone and coming downstairs for breakfast." Yep, I definitely sounded convincing. No way was I gonna admit that I was being cowardly and crawling back in bed to hide from the stupidly scary world.

"Yeah, you would definitely fit in at the office in that outfit," He commented looking down at my fit for the day.

Damn it! I forgot to change. Oh well, I tried. Time for bed. I dropped the charade and started towards my bed when he called out and stopped me.

"Stop right there, young lady. I will not stand by and let you get scared." He stepped forward and turned to face me. I tried but I could not bring myself to look up at him. All the emotions regarding my first day of work came crashing down and my eyes were filled with tears.

I tried to keep them under control, do it how mama always said, but I couldn't help it. I couldn't hide my emotions like mama and my older sister, Ayesha. Ayesha always followed mama's words better than me. She could turn any situation to be in her favour, even when she was in the wrong. 

But I could only ever wish to be like her. Not that I actually do wish that, but it would certainly make everything much easier for me. I was too sensitive, as evidenced by my tears. My mama hated it, but my baba loved it. I was always His darling Imani, His precious little bundle of faith.

He always knew how I was feeling, like right now, he knew just when I needed him. And right now, I need nothing more than a big warm hug from my baba.

I didn't look up at him. I simply threw my arms around him and held him tight. And he didn't say anything except coo at me, and comfort me. He didn't ask me to stop crying, he didn't ask me to hurry up, He just held me while I cried and let go of all my fears. Oh baba, how do you always know.

It was my first day at my first ever job. I had tried working before but an office environment was way too constricting for me. The people were gossipy and too judgmental. I lasted two whole weeks before it became too much for me. I ended up working remotely till that ended. 

But ever since my graduation, Baba was adamant that I try to work in an office setting again. His argument being that him being close-by would help my anxiety, and whenever it becomes too much for me, I can always come to him for a hug. 

If you ask me though, he just misses me too much and wants to spend more time together. Which is all great in my opinion, I just wish this stupid anxiety would stop already.

"Oh darling, I know you're scared. But kiddo, the world is always going to be scary. People are always going to judge you and someone is always going to be mean to you. That's precisely why I need you to be stronger. So that one day, if I'm ever not around, my precious daughter can protect herself." His voice became filled with emotions by the end and I knew his eyes held tears as well. I hated him saying he wouldn't be there. He's my baba, he'll always be there. But I also knew that I needed to do this.

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