[COMPLETED] That Autumn | Wonwoo (short-story)

四

Is wishing for him to always be by my side a selfishness? That's all I want. I want to see this world with him. I crave his warmth, I want... to always be with him...

I... just want to be with you, is that too much to ask?

One night in January, exactly 2 months after Wonwoo left Songju to settle in Incheon. My whole body feels frozen. I sit on a metal chair restlessly, watching people passing by in front of me, hoping that one of them will bring good news. My head hurts, and I struggle to breathe a little. I don't know how long I've been stuck in the same position. I also don't care about the hunger that makes my stomach ached. I don't want to go anywhere. No, I'm not going anywhere.

Last night, someone from the hospital called me. I woke up to the shrill ringing of my cellphone. I picked up the phone. I listened to the person speak for a few moments, and within a short time, the call ended. I stared into the darkness, saying nothing. I could only cry. My chest felt tight and painful.

"Wonwoo was found unconscious in his apartment."

At that moment, with my legs feeling weak, I hurried to visit the hospital, and now, here I am. Amidst the hustle and bustle of this hospital, I am alone. I don't speak to anyone. I just keep praying and hoping.

But why could that happen...? What happened to him? Is he in trouble? Is there something he's hiding and not telling me? Various questions keep swirling in my head. The voices around me become unheard. My head is filled with the sounds of my own questions. I want to close both of my ears, but it wouldn't mean anything.

I glance towards the door of the room where Wonwoo is. I can only see the nurse bustling back and forth through the small window on the door, and a male doctor who looks to be in his late 40s, he appears very serious and furrows his brow. A nurse helps wipe his sweat. Their expressions are not what I hoped for. Everything seems very busy. None of them appear relaxed even for a moment. All my fears slowly intensify, and I become more restless and trembling. I notice my fingertips slightly turning blue. They're freezing.

The more I observe, the doctor's expression becomes even more serious. Is he feeling anxious? Because no other word can describe the doctor's expression. I see someone handing the doctor a defibrillator. Why are they using it? Is it that serious that the last resort is to use that device? My eyes sting with the effort of holding back tears, as does my chest, which feels increasingly tight.

My vision grows blurrier. All I remember is when the doctor placed his defibrillator... with an expression filled with disappointment.

All of this feels surreal.

The doctor brought news I didn't want to hear from him...

"...Wonwoo is no longer with us."