The Amnesia Diaries {Calum Hood}

Chocolate and Weed

I worked all day today yet I wasn't tired at all. I closed my eyes, hoping I would fall asleep but I didn't. I stared at the wall and thought about my life before I got amnesia. I always wondered what happened in those five years that I completely forgot. After thinking for awhile I got hungry so I decided to go get a snack. I quietly got out of bed and tippy toed to the refrigerator.

When I opened it I realized it was almost empty. There was only a few water bottles and one hershey bar. Even though I wasn't in the mood to eat chocolate in the middle of night I did it anyways. I was desperate for food. I turned to my left and saw Calum sleeping on the couch like a baby. I almost forgot that he was living with me for awhile. I wanted to wake him up because I was bored and needed someone to talk to but I knew that would be a terrible idea since he told me he was really tired last night. I barely see him because he's working all day.

I was so bored I just wanted to grab my jacket and run far away. All of a sudden I remembered Ashton. I couldn't stop thinking about him during work. My heart beat so fast when I was around him. I couldn't breathe or talk when I saw him. All I wanted to do was run back to the candy shop and talk to him. Even though I knew it was a bad idea to go outside at this time I didn't care. It's not like Calum cares anyway.

So that's exactly what I did. I grabbed my coat and went outside. It was probably the stupidest idea I could ever come up with. As I went outside I realize it started to snow. I wrapped my arms around myself more tightly to keep out the cold. The snow is falling more quickly now and I felt a chill run up my spine. The strong wind rustled heavily through the desolate trees. I was outside for only a few minutes and I was already starting to regret this. I continued walking until I finally made it to the candy store.

I looked through the window and saw Ashton. He was holding a cigarette in between his lips. His hair is perfect. His dimples are perfect. His jaw line is perfect. Everything about him is perfect. Finally I opened the door and went inside the store.

"Ariana?" He whispered as soon as he saw me. I couldn't take my eyes off him. I don't know why but I was willing to do anything to be with him. "Are you ok?" He asked. I almost forgot how to speak while I was with him.

"Yes." I finally said. "I was just bored so I decided to stop by and say hi."

"Uh, ok?" Ashton said, confused. I watched him as he grabbed his bag and tried to look for something. Most of the time he barely talked to me or looked at me so it made me wonder if we ever talked to each other before I got amnesia.

"What are you looking for?" I asked.

"You'll see." He said with a smirk. When he finally pulled his hand out of the bag I saw him holding weed.

"Is that..."

"Yep." He said as he laughed. I didn't understand what he was laughing at. The only think I was focused on was the fact that he was holding a bag filled with weed. "Wanna smoke with me?" He asked. At first I thought he was joking but when he waited for me to reply I realized he wasn't kidding. I couldn't believe I was actually considering this. There was so way I was going to smoke weed with him.

"That's not good for you." I said.

"I don't care."

"Where do you even get that?"

"I know people." He smirked. "So, do you want some?" I knew that it was a bad idea but this was probably the only chance I have to get closer to Ashton.

"Sure." I finally said. I kept reminding myself that I'm twenty years old and that there are so many people that are younger than me that smoke weed. He passed me the joint and waited for me to smoke it. I carefully placed it in between my lips. He watched me as I was smoking it which I thought was really creepy. Finally he took another one out of the bag and started smoking it. At first I felt dizzy and sick but after a few minutes I felt relaxed. I looked at Ashton who already looked so high. I promised myself I would only smoke for a few minutes but it's been over a hour and I couldn't stop.

Ashton moved closer to me and put his lips against mine. My heart raced and I found myself struggling to breathe. We collapsed on the floor but our lips still didn't separate. His hands went underneath my shirt and I felt him trying to lift up my shirt. It was at that moment when I realized what I was doing. Who wants to lose my virginity to a guy I knew for one day on this dirty floor? I immediately pulled away from him.

"Is everything ok?" He asked.

"I'm sorry but I can't do this." I said.

"You're probably right. The last time we did this it almost got you killed."

"What are you talking about?"

"Oh shit. I almost forgot that you have amnesia." Ashton said as we both got up from the ground. Before I was able to ask him more questions I heard someone open the door.

"Get away from her!" Calum growled. He looked at me with disappointment then turned back to Ashton. He looked at Ashton as if he was going to kill him. Calum grabbed my arm and forced me to leave the store. He didn't even talk to me as he took me back to my apartment. I don't even know why he cares so much. He should be happy I'm letting him stay in my apartment.

"What were you thinking!" He said when we finally arrived. "You're gonna be late for school today!" He wouldn't stop talking but I just ignored him. He sat down on the couch while I was going to my bedroom. Before I went to my room I turned around and saw him covering his face with his hands. When he took his hands away from his face I saw a few tears come down his cheeks.

"Hey, I'm sorry." I said as I sat down next to me. He looked at me but didn't say a word. "How did you know where I was?" I asked.

"Just a guess." He shrugged.

"I'm really sorry. I didn't even know what I was doing until he tried to take my shirt off. I just want to make sure my first time is special." As soon as I said that he started laughing. I haven't seen him smiling in along time so it felt nice to make him laugh. "What's so funny?" I said as I playfully punched his arm.

"I just find it funny how you think you're a virgin."

"Wait...I'm not? How do you know that? Was I one of those girls that constantly talked about their sex life with their friends?"

"No, you weren't. I just know." He laughed. "You should get some rest."

"I can't go to sleep! I'm not tired."

"You should at least try." He said. While he was laying on the couch he grabbed my arm and pulled me closer to him. He wrapped his arms around me. I was able to hear his heartbeat since I was so close to his chest. At first I wanted to pull away but it felt so safe in his arms. After a few minutes I closed my eyes and fell asleep.