The Wolf and the Lion (a Dragon Age Inquisition fanfic)

Three

Some months later, Talila sat curled up into a ball, her face showing the excruciating pain her body was going through at the moment. She did not hear the voices of the people outside of her locked door as the pain wracked her entire body as if a fright train had come and plowed right into her; she was fighting with it as best as possible, but it wasn't until she heard Cullen's voice call out over the crowd that had gathered just outside, that she knew how bad it was. "Return to your duties!" He sounded slightly angry but something in her told her that was just a front to get everyone to leave. Once the voices died down and had disappeared a gentle knock sounded and once more Cullen's voice echoed to her. "Talila? Are you in there?" As much as she wanted to answer him the pain slamming full speed into her body like a train prevented her from doing so as she had to clenched her jaws to keep from making a noise. "Talila, I have a spare key and I'm coming in." Cullen warned her but there was little she could do about it. When the door opened, Cullen gaze swept towards her and upon seeing her curled around herself, he was quick to shut the door again after entering. He all but raced to her side and after sitting on her bed, while still being ever so gentle, he pulled her close to him. "Talila! I'm here now. Everything will be okay." He promised as another spazzum of pain caused her to whimper as her eyes shut. Having him see her in this sorry state made her feel weak, and she did not enjoy feeling weak, but in some small way, it was also comforting to have him there. "It's okay Talila, I am here for you. I will stay at your side for as long as I can." He managed to brush his fingers through her curly hair, and that motion seemed to calm her unyielding pain just enough to be somewhat more bearable. He took note of this and continued to stroke her hair until finally the sound of soft breathing had him laying her down and covering her with a blanket. "I won't leave your side for long." He promised as he left to speak with the Inquisitor, who was now in a worried state of mind for the woman and when Cullen returned back to her room he found her still sleeping like a babe.

When Talila awoke in the late hours of the night she saw that Cullen was passed clean out in a chair, and found herself unable to awaken him despite how badly she wanted to. I shouldn't wake him, yet... I can't bring myself to just lay here while he sleeps in that chair... then another thought struck her as she realized she was truly starting to care for him in more then just love, What is wrong with me? Since when did I start caring so much... For Cullen...? It was then that Cullen mumbled something and Talila had to almost strain to hear his words, but what he said had her feeling the warm and fuzzy feelings of blossoming love and she tried not to smile which majestically failed. She closed her eyes and silently memorized those sleepy words of his not realizing that she quickly fell back to sleep. When finally she woke up for good and managed to sit up without pain, she looked out the wind to see the sunset of another day. Gah! How long was I out?!

"Three days." Cullen's voice surprised her as he yawned having apparently taken a nap in the chair. He stood up and stretched, "Everyone is worried about you. Even you had me scared."

"I'm sorry." Talila spoke with sadness in her voice and showing in her eyes.

"Don't be." He told her as he sat at the edge of the bed. He lifted a hand and gently caressed her check. "You can't help that this is what your going through, it's not something I would not have wished on anyone, not even you." He placed his full hand on her cheek and she leaned her head into his palm.

"Cullen, I'm...." she stopped short. Nothing she could say would describe the feelings that were twisting inside of her at that exact moment, but one feeling that didn't show in her eyes was the feeling she had for him. I do care for him...but seeing him and hearing his voice...it sparks something in me that nothing and no else could and it frightens me.

"I don't need to be told, I can see it in your eyes. Your fighting it."

"It's not just that, I've been fighting with myself to not lash out at everyone and everything. I don't know if I have the strength to continue this fight. If I don't do something soon, I will end up lashing out and... I don't want to think of what could happen if I go into such a fit, or who I would hurt if it happened. Especially if that someone were you..."

"Talila, you wouldn't hurt me." Cullen explained looking at her.

"You don't know that," Talila forced herself not to cry and to keep as calm as possible. "I don't know what I would do if my rage gets the best of me. I could hurt you or worse..."

Cullen leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "I trust you." He whispered in a loving tone. "I trust you to be able to come back to your senses before you could hurt me."

"Your putting a lot of faith in me." Talila frowned as he kissed her forehead again.

"Because I have faith in you. Now I will return with something for you to eat. I don't want you to spend what little energy you have left after being down for three days too quickly." With that he left but in his stead a woman Talila had come to know very well walked in, "Cassandra, I need to call in that favor." Talila looked to the woman who nodded.

"I will get preparations ready for your...trip. Just make sure to return before next winter."

"Don't worry, I will. I can't risk hurting Cullen or anyone for that matter." With that Cassandra nodded and walked out of the room. I'm sorry Cullen, I have to do this. For both my sake and yours. And a few days later once she was able to move freely without the stinging pain of the withdrawals and under the cover of moonless night, Talila left Skyhold. She dared to look back only once before continuing on her way, and now for the longest time that she would be able to remember Talila was completely and utterly alone. Forgive me Cullen.