"When someone loves you, the way they talk about you is different. You feel safe and comfortable." -Jess C. Scott
When I was halfway through the door, Hazeema turned to me and smiled a warm, inviting smile. "How about we sit outside and talk? We're going to be living together for a year, why not start getting to know each other now? And why waste such perfect weather as this?" She laughed and I laughed with her. "That sounds nice." I nodded. And it did sound nice. Back in Kashmir, talking about your feelings was a sign that you were weak. Abbu used to get mad, even when I said only that I was upset. He'd say that I needed to keep my mouth shut and stop being so weak. It used to make him so angry, only he was allowed to say if he was feeling a little under the weather. Once I was explaining to my mother that I was feeling stressed due to the large amount of homework and revision I had been given that day. She listened, understood, gave advice. That was until my father came in and beat her up for making me 'soft'.
"Do you drink tea?" Hazeema asked. I nodded, smiling to myself as I reminisced the only experiences I'd ever had with tea. "Ammi Jee used to sneak me some when Abbu wasn't looking." I laughed despondently. She chuckled, "Your mum sounds like a great person."
I smiled, solemnly. She is.
She gestured for me to go outside, "Go on. Find a good place for us to chat whilst I go make some tea. Don't wander too far, okay?"
I nodded, positively absorbing her smiles and laughter, before walking back out the door and onto the beautiful grass. The ice and snow was melting off of the roof, droplets of icy water dripping from the gutter below the roof. The tips of the mountains were also melting their layer of snow, leaving a bed of wet grass beneath it. I stumbled across the fresh grass and found a lovely spot where I sat and waited. It seemed comfortable and had a perfect view of the mountains, I knew it'd be a great place to unwind. I crossed my legs, suddenly thinking that I'd over-thought this location, but it was too late now.
It was easy to see the mountain as just its peak, but in truth the land was rising around it for a long way before it became a rocky projection into the cerulean sky-line. The swelling ground was covered in farms and forests, trees shooting into the sky like weeds. I cast my eye right down to the river and then up towards the mountain, at the base. Part way up the cloud prevented me from seeing the peak, perhaps, that was a good thing. Seeing all the way up could be daunting from down here, but inwardly I prayed for it to clear as I sat and inspected the beautiful view. Mists were crowding in the valleys, each bald mountain top shone like a jewel.
The grass waved like people in a stadium, catching the light in a way that shows it isn't one green but many. The blades were skinny and broad, but in this area they were packed so tightly I couldn't see the earth beneath. A variety of colourful birds sang like they've never seen a dawn so fresh and I had to agree. I could see this a hundred times over and never tire of it. These fields are the fields of home. Perhaps I had to go far away to appreciate it, but never again. I see its beauty for the wonder it is and know this is where I am most at peace.
At home in Kashmir, it was easy to sit on a hot, tin roof and inspect a beautiful sunrise, but here, it didn't feel like an escape, it felt like a reward. Something I knew I would never tire of doing.
I sat and watched the sun rise higher above the mountains, when Hazeema suddenly arrived holding two purple mugs filled with tea. "Oh, there you are!" She handed me my cup, which I held carefully with two hands, and she sat next to me holding hers. "Nice spot, you've picked!"
I laughed, "There's a nice view of the mountains from here...I like the mountains. They're beautiful."
She beamed, "They are...aren't they? I guess that's why I wanted to live here."
"It must've been hard...your husband leaving you, I mean." I summed up the courage to say. If I was going to live with her for a year, I needed to have the confidence to speak to her. "It was at first...knowing that he only cared about having a kid, and not me." She paused. "I just convinced myself that I never needed him, that he was never good enough for me anyway. That helped me get over him." She cleared her throat and sat up, sipping her tea, getting ready to explain. The bed of green grass flattened beneath her as she crossed her legs.
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Destiny - مقدر
Περιπέτεια"This is your fiancé and his family. I thought you knew they were coming?" Knew they were coming? I didn't even know I was engaged, I'm sixteen! Aqsa must escape a child marriage in Kashmir that her abusive father and confused, vulnerable mother h...
