Coffee & Nerves (boyxboy)

[9] The Crotch Incident

"Always grab your tray from here because these ones have been touched by the least amount of hands," Jack instructs.

He hands Max a tray.

Everything he's telling him- it's all complete bull, but it's cute that he's trying.

No.

Bad Spencer.

Stop reinforcing society's low expectations for men. Basic human decency should be expected from everyone, it's not something 'cute' for a guy to do once in awhile and have everyone around them swoon over, like what happens all the time with Jack.

N-not that I'm swooning, but the girls at our school certainly are.

Oh, don't be so foolish as to think that I haven't noticed their little discussions when he's passing them in the hallways... or sitting nearby... or not even there.

It's weird. They all talk about how nice and respectful he is??

Like, what? Who?

At first, I thought there was no possible way they could be talking about Jack, my Jack.

But they were. I guess I could kind of see it. He doesn't degrade women or use racist and homophobic slurs. So, I guess he's better than half of the male population at school. But that doesn't make him cute.

His pouted lips and furrowed brow with that scrunched up 'concentration' face is what makes him cute.

Spencer- no. Bad Spencer.

I hastily try to focus on my surroundings and distract myself from those thoughts I should not be having.

Jack's explaining how to determine whether or not a carton of milk has gone sour to Max when he suddenly stops him from walking toward the food.

"Wait a minute, buddy. This is crucial stuff to know," Jack says with sincerity.

I honestly can't tell whether he's joking or not. Jack's always making me confused. I hate it.

"Before you decide what line to get into, let me tell you how to avoid a stale or cold lunch. If you see that only a few of something is left, like the burgers over there, let people go ahead of you and pretend to have a temporary sudden craving for nachos instead that's making you hesitate. Within 10-30 seconds, a new tray full of hot hamburgers will be placed right in front of you and you decide that nachos are nacho thing anymore." Jack laughs at his own joke and Max lets out a small chuckle.

I even feel my lips twitch into a smile. What can I say? I'm a sucker for crappy puns.

He gestures to the screen displaying the day's lunch menu.

"So there's your 3 options for lunch." He sends a mysterious smile Max's way. "Pick your poison."

Max's cheeks turn red. "Um, I think I'll get the corndog," Max utters quietly.

"Not bad, not bad. I think I'll get that one too."

I follow them down to the corndog line, picking up a tray and silverware, even though I hate corndogs.

Even though I actually have my own packed lunch in my bag that has food I do like. I'll just eat it during my third block. That's when I have trig, which shouldn't be too strict on eating policies due to the fact that I have that class with Mr. Vanark, who is known for being really chill.

We're walking down through the line when Max reaches to scoop up some corn and Jack slaps his hand, causing him to drop the spoon into the tub of corn.