Blues

50. Blue Moon

"I can't believe we're finally done with those goddamn exams!" Alexa breathes out in relief. "I haven't partied since forever!" She grouches, casting about her bag for something mysterious.

I admit that I was as ruffled by those exams as her. However, our rationales are a bit diverse. She wanted to fled college to party and have fun. I wanted to fled the entire city.

For good.

We both amble down the corridor, headed to the stairwell, and I can't help but feel discouraged. I know I haven't been in Seattle for long, but a wistful feeling keeps pricking me. My plans have already been set into motion, and I know that abandoning them would do me no good, but there is still that part of my heart that keeps aching whenever I remember Dylan, in spite of those detrimental things he has put me through.

I have been through so much pain, that I've become a chattel to it.

"Candice!" A quiet, mellow voice pulls me out of my thoughts, prompting me to swerve immediately.

"Claire." I only state, tilting my head to the side. Ever since what happened at my place, I never thought she would approach me, even after I decided to spare her from any legal proceedings. It stands to reason that my grandmother wasn't very satiated by my determination, which drove her to persecute me all the time, glozing it over by her excuse: She's worried about me.

And I—with little effort—eventually gave in, and decided to go live with her. I figured that I no longer want a life in a city that fractured me deeply, and I knew she coveted the presence of family so much. Though she's the reason behind everything that's happened to me and those I love, I still felt like I owed her that small indulgence before her curtains are lugged shut.

Claire's eyes sprint from me to Alexa, silently asking her to give us some time alone. Alexa quickly catches the hint, retreating. "I'll wait for you in the car." She informs me, turning to leave.

Shifting my attention back to Claire, I wait for her to spit it out. I know how she's struggling to say something, and I can understand how egotistic she is, and how she feels the need to downscale herself enough to talk about a mistake she has perpetrated. She clears he throat, shuffling her feet, before she meets my eyes. "Look," she starts, swallowing. "It's really hard for me to-

"To apologize?" I fire my question, cutting her off.

She gapes at me for a moment, before she nods. "Only because an apology wouldn't suffice, after what I've done." She shrugs.

"Give it a try." I shrug right back.

She clears her throat, seeming to be trying to contrive an appropriate apology. "Well, I'm sorry. I really am. You might not believe this, but I never meant to hurt anyone." I raise a skeptical eyebrow at that, invoking a flush to shawl her face. "Well, I did, but not like that! I was driven by boundless anger at you after that video, and I found myself bargaining with that guy."

"You mean the guy who beat the shit out of me, before he tried to rape me?" I taunt, just to see that flush grow, before I shake my head, needing to end this conversation as soon as possible. "Let's be logical here. When I spared you, I didn't do it for you. I did it for a normal college girl who still had a future before her. However, that doesn't mean I'll forget about it, and I know that you can't care less. So, you can just move on and try to remedy your friendships with those I've stolen from you. I won't be there to compete anymore."

The last part seems to tickle her interest. "What do you mean?"

"What I mean is that I'm transferring to another college. You can go back to your old life now." I lift one shoulder in a shrug, before I position my satchel onto the other shoulder, ready to follow Alexa. "Goodbye."