reckless 【 the outsiders 】

twenty.

"Afternoon, Leigh," Dr. Goldberg greets the girl, anxiously waiting on the bed. Leigh had gone to the doctor twice since she'd gotten the news and this was her third. At a little over two months, she was feeling all the negative effects and wishing she could end the whole thing.

"Hi."

"How are you feeling?"

Leigh sighed and shrugged, rubbing her head in slight irritation. "Tired. Sore. Irritated. Even more tired."

"Well, that is typical of a woman in the first three months."

"It don't last for the rest of the nine months, does it?"

"No, no. Your body will get used to the hormone changes and adapt. You should regain your energy and stop feeling so nauseous by the second trimester." Leigh nodded and couldn't help but be so grateful that her doctor was a woman. She couldn't imagine hearing such things from a man and being nearly as comfortable.

"Okay, what are we doing today?"

The doctor glanced at her clipboard before sitting it down and taking a seat across from Leigh. "First we're going to do a sonogram to make sure the baby is healthy and on track, then I'll give you a quick check-up and that'll be all."

Leigh agreed and everything only took around twenty minutes with her asking so many questions, many of which were more personal pregnancy related questions than general. She felt herself growing and knew that the baggy shirts and blouses in her closet wouldn't hide for long which is why she knew she ought to begin telling people.

So far, Gigi and her boss at the hotel were the only ones who knew and another thing she appreciated about her job was that she wasn't punished for being young, unmarried, and pregnant. Also the fact that she wasn't the only one. Her second job at the store was a different story which is why she decided to completely ignore it until her boss brought it to her.

While Leigh was putting off her worries, Gigi was stressing enough for the both of them. She begged Leigh to tell someone but Dallas didn't like kids, her dad didn't like Dallas, and her brothers would tell her dad. That was another thing she's been ignoring. Despite Gigi's warnings, Leigh was sure that ignoring her problems was working.

"What are you doin'?" She heard the familiar voice ask from her door.

She jumped, startled, from her position in front of the mirror where she was fixing her hair and examining her belly. Leigh turned to face the boy at the door. "Nothing! How long have you been standin' there like a creep?"

"Long enough."

She tugged at her shirt, which was actually Dallas's shirt, and sat down on her small bed. "How'd you get in here?"

"Door's unlocked."

She thought about Gigi and rolled her eyes, trying to come up with a believable excuse for examining her stomach in the mirror. "One of the girls said I looked like I gained a few pounds but whatever. Can I ask you a question?"

"Just did."

Ignoring him, she continued, "Y'know you've never asked me to go steady with you."

"That a question?"

"Are we?"

"You gotta ask?" he questions, sitting down her on her bed and laying his head on her lap. His hair dampening her growing thighs. She instinctively ran her fingers through his dark hair and just stared at the side of his head, imagining all of the possible responses to this news she had. Only one of them didn't end in him leaving.

"Well, yeah. How should I know?"

"Maybe because we've been seein' each other for damn near ten months? Or 'cause I'm still here after you forgot I was even alive when you went off to Hollywood or whatever."

"Do you... love me?"

Dallas turned over slowly and looked Leigh directly in the eyes. He wasn't sure whether or not she was testing him and it made him want to crawl into himself. His silence worried her even more but she did a good job at looking like it didn't bother her.

"You don't."

"What?"

"That's fine, I shouldn't have asked."

"Leigh--"

"Forget it, okay? I didn't even mention it."

"But I do."

"No, you don't."

"I told you I did once a while ago. You was mad so you don't remember and I never wanted to say it again. Y'know how you blank when ya' get mad."

Her head tilted to the side as she thought about it. For the life of her, Leigh couldn't remember hearing the word love leave his lips but she believed him anyway; surely he wouldn't lie about something like that, something that personal. She wished he was lying, though, because she loved him too. The last thing she wanted was for Dallas to leave but she was sure he would.

While Leigh worried, Winston's mind was wandering as well. She hadn't talked to him in days, she was acting weird, he could tell something was wrong and he didn't wanna be the problem.

"You ain't loved nobody else for real, huh?" Leigh questions, now looking at the ceiling and searching for patterns in the bright white paint. Anything to distract her from what she needed to say.

"Nope."

"You ain't gonna leave me, right?" The question was baffling. There wasn't a single thing he could think of to make him consider leaving and he let it be known. Still, her doubts weren't letting her leave it alone. "What if I was knocked up or somethin'?"

Winston shrugged and thought nothing of the scenario, figuring it was simply that. He considered for a second what that would really mean but stopped before he got too into his head about it. "Long as it's mine."

A humorless chuckle left Leigh's throat and they both stood up. "What are you askin' all these questions for?"

"No reason."

"Y'know, I don't believe that."

"You don't wanna know."

"Yeah, I asked 'cause I didn't wanna know."

Gigi's words ran back and forth through the blonde's head and suddenly, she felt so bad and could no longer hold it in. Her eyes teared up and Leigh could've slapped herself but she knew it was mostly the fault of the pregnancy hormones which made her go easier on herself for now.

"Hey, come on, what's wrong?" Unable to speak, the girl shook her head vigorously and shifted her eyes down to the floor. It was now certain to Dally that something was up with his girlfriend. "Leigh, I know, like, everything about you. You think I can't see that somethin' is wrong?"

"I'm--uh--w-we're havin' a kid, Dallas," she mumbles, just barely loud enough for him to hear. The room was silent as the words hung in the air, awaiting a response from the obviously shocked boy standing by the door.

"What?"

edited 12-29-21