Where Reason Fades

Chapter 13

Two days went by. A week. A month. The satellite came and went in range, and still nothing. Merlin had gone through being concerned, passed by being sad, waved a fond greeting to anger, and was now sitting quite uncomfortably in glowering and miserable. Gwen had tried to cheer him up by making his favourite cake - dried fruit - and Gwaine had tried getting him drunk, which just ended with Gwaine escorting him home when he wouldn't stop wailing about how he'd been 'beguiled'. Gwaine at least had the good grace to admit that particular episode was his fault. Gauis had just given him a long look and told him to get more gauze, which he appreciated intensely, and turned his energies back into his work tenfold.

"Hel" Merlin muttered under his breath, swiping his hand to erase the last few cells of data on his screen. He'd copied over the wrong numbers, again, because he'd been distracted, again, thinking about a certain member of the Intergalactic Royal House of Pendragon who had still not called him in over a month despite the fact he definitely had a copy of the satellite schedule, and Merlin had already checked that the satellite isn't out of service. Again.

He glared back at his screen trying to force himself to concentrate, but a shuffling and muttering and whispering outside his door wormed it way into his consciousness unltill he couldn't focus on anything else anyway, even if he'd wanted to. He stood and strode over to the door, yanking it open and glowering.

"What is it, Gwen?" He asked, pained.

"Merlin!" Gwen squeaked in surprise as the door her and Lance had been whispering very loudly in front of was yanked open.

"Um, I- we just wanted to talk to you. And see if you'd seen...this." She handed him a Spacenet tablet nervously, as though she was afrid he might bit eher hand off if she came too close. He frowned and took it, skimming down the page until a headline caught his attention and made his chest constricyt painfully and his heart plummet through the ground.

A Royal Affair: Prince Arthur Announces Engagement to Spaceiety Girl Sophia Tirmor

"Not that I wanted to upset you, or anything, it's just I thought you should know, but you've probably seen it anyway. Or if you haven't then I didn't want to keep it from you, not that I'd be hiding it because it's in the news and everything - oh." She trailed off as she looked desperately to Lance for help and he shook his head gently.

Merlin felt like all his blood had rushed to his head, scorching his cheeks, and then immediately drained away again leaving him cold and trembling. This couldn't be right. Arthur had said- they had talked... He frowned. Arthur didn't like Sophia, that much he'd made perfectly clear, so why would he choose to spend the rest of his life with her? Was it his father? As much of a prat he might be, he would have called, he would have told Merlin something. The silence was worrying.

"Right." It came out distracted, short, as the thoughts whirled in his mind.

"Are you okay?" Lance asked, frowning at him in concern but Merlin didn't look up, still staring at the article in front of him.

"Yeah...thanks. I'm gonna..." he pointed behind him vaguely, then shut the door on the couple and went back to his desk. He set the tablet down and tapped his fingernails on the surface, chewing on his lower lip. Should he call? Or had Arthur made it transparently obvious he wanted nothing to do with Merlin? Had he just dreamed what happened on dydd glaw? He rubbed his hands over his face and stared at the mottled surface of his desk.

There was too much he didn't know, that he didn't understand. He needed to talk to Arthur, to hear his voice. He sitched the timetab;e on to his screen. The satelitte was in range. He grabbed his handset before he could chance to change his mind and entered Arthur's number in so fast he fumbled it and the line honked at him in invalidity. He tried again, slowing his hand, and pressed the handset to his ear.