Promise Me (Book One of the Kirkland Family)

Promise Me: Chapter 46

Chapter 46

By Sunday night, they were home.

Home.  

Justin dropped the suitcases on the floor of the kitchen and looked around.  Soon -- if he had his way -- the place would be full of wild, heathen kids and Josie doing her homework there at that kitchen table and toys everywhere...and Hannah.  His days and nights full of Hannah and their brood of Kirklands.  And proud grandparents over every weekend, spoiling the mess out of all of them.  And then before he knew it -- and he hoped it wasn’t for many, many years to come -- he and Hannah would stand there in that kitchen, and the house would be empty of their children, and they would have each other’s sole attention again, until they hopped off to spoil their grandchildren on the weekends.

It was a perfect dream.  It was a perfect life.  And he wanted it...bad.  There wasn’t a thing he would change.  Except the bed upstairs.  Not big enough for him, and especially not big enough for all those late night cuddles with their future family.

“What are you staring at?” Hannah asked as she went over to the refrigerator to grab a bottle of water.  Josie went straight to the study to check on the guinea pigs.  

“Nothing in particular,” he said.  

She raised an eyebrow at him as she sipped her water.

He walked over to her -- a determined stride -- and lifted her up.  “God, I love you,” he whispered.  Water sloshed over his neck as she scrambled for a hold before he dropped her.  “Let’s go upstairs and make babies.”

Hannah giggled.  “We just got back.  I’d like to go through the mail, call the hospital to see how Mom is doing, and sort through the laundry and maybe fix up some dinner before we turn in for the night.”

“No...no mail, no laundry--”

“Come on!” Josie complained as she entered the room with Lady and Teddy cradled in both her arms.  “Give a girl a break!  I swear, everytime I see you two, you’re kissing, or hugging, or doing gross adult stuff!”

Justin set Hannah back down on her feet and turned to his daughter.  “Gross, huh?  It’s called love, you idgit.  And I love you, too.”  And with that, he picked up Josie and swung her around.  The rats squealed from the sudden motions, but Josie laughed.  Justin smacked a kiss on top of her head, his lips smiling so wide, he felt giddy.

He grabbed Hannah and yanked her into a three-way hug, burying his face into her red hair.  Hannah chuckled.

“I think your daddy is so tired from the drive, his brain has congealed,” she told Josie.

“It doesn’t matter,” Justin muttered.  “I’ve got my two best girls here, and my brain can go ahead and turn to mush.  I’m good, just let me savor the moment before all heck breaks loose again.”

“Well, I’m hungry,” Josie said.  “And Grandma and Grandpa said they would stop by after church tonight to visit.  They sounded worried when I talked to them yesterday.”

And with that, Justin’s brain perked back up...solemnly.  Right.  He’d talked to his parents yesterday, too, and they were not happy about Beth visiting them over the weekend.  He was in trouble.  He had forgone any mention of his talk with Beth to them, so they had not been prepared for her sudden appearance.  Beth was his problem, and he hated getting his parents involved.  Almost as much as he hated getting Hannah involved.  At least, his mom and dad already knew what Beth was like, but still...they shouldn’t have been forced to deal with her on their own, unaware.

“Yeah,” he replied, moving back from Hannah and Josie as he faced them.  “They were upset that your mother came looking for you.”

Josie frowned.  “You didn’t tell me that.  When was this?”

“Yesterday.”

“That’s why Grandma sounded like she wanted to beat at the wall with her frying pan?”

“Um...yeah.”

Josie looked at Hannah.  "Is that why you looked like you were hiding something yesterday?  Why you unplugged the phone, because my mother called looking for me?”

Hannah nodded, eying Josie carefully.  “I didn’t want to worry you about it.”

Josie’s lips thinned out as she turned back to Justin.  “You promised, Daddy.  You said you wouldn’t keep things from me anymore.”

“I’m sorry,” he said.  “We’re trying to get it all worked out, honey.  You’ve made your choice, so I didn’t think you’d want to speak with her.”

“I get to decide that,” Josie said between clenched teeth.  “Don’t you think she needs to hear that from me?”

“Honey,” Justin began, “you heard what Mr. Bruens said the other day.  A year, no contact, before we are completely finished with her, and Hannah is able to file the adoption papers--”

“One day would not make much difference!” Josie shouted.  

“Okay,” Justin said, holding his hands up in surrender.  “You’re mad, I can see that--”

“Yes, I’m mad!”  She glanced at Hannah for a second.  “If I’m old enough to choose who I want for a mother, then I’m old enough to tell the other one to leave me alone!”  She inhaled quickly and let out the breath slowly.  “Hannah...yes, I’d love nothing more than for you to marry my daddy and accept me as your own, and Daddy, yes, I want the three of us to be that perfect family that I see when I go to my friends’ houses...and I know that will take a long time, but my mother will never stop until she hears it from me!  She’ll always think that it’s been your choice this whole time, if I don’t say something to her.  I have the right to see her and tell her.  You cannot keep me away from her anymore.  If she comes back, then I want to tell her to buck off.”

Justin blinked.  “I’m sorry...what did you say?”

And Josie blinked at him.  “Buck off...I said, ‘buck off.’  Not the other thing.  I’m not stupid.”

“Buck off?” Justin muttered to himself.  He saw Hannah turn her head slightly away, with a smile tugging at her lips.  “It’s not funny.  That’s almost as bad as...the other thing.”

Hannah cleared her throat and faced him.  “But she does have a point,” she argued.  “I was wrong not to say anything about Beth calling you yesterday, and Josie should confront Beth soon.  Josie needs to stand up for herself, and Beth needs to hear it.”

“Yeah,” Justin said, “but...buck off?”

“Would you prefer the other thing?”

“No!”

“Then buck off, it is,” Hannah said.  “And I also agree on that point.  Beth needs to buck off.”

Justin closed his eyes.  His two best girls.  One was going to drive him to an early grave and the other one...no, both were sending him there.  But he loved them.  And they were right.  Beth needed to...buck off.

“Just keep it clean when you do talk to her,” he told Josie quietly.  "The last thing we need is for her to file a complaint against me as an unfit parent because of your language."

“You know I will, Daddy,” Josie replied.  “After all...you’re the one I choose to live with.  I don’t want to disappoint you.”

And right now, Justin felt that was all that mattered.  Josie chose him.

Half an hour later, his parents arrived and Josie asked if she could go spend the night at the farm.  She missed it.  He complied, but gave her the directive that if her mother did contact her, she was to call him immediately.

“Don’t worry, dear,” his mother said as they exited off the newly built front porch.  “Your dad scared her off good.  I doubt she’ll try to come back to the farm anytime soon.  Love the porch, by the way.”

“Thank you,” Justin and Hannah echoed.

He didn’t want to think about how his dad managed to “scare her off good.”  That had every kind of illegal scenario written all over it.  As soon as his parents and Josie disappeared down the road in Ronald Kirkland’s pickup truck, Hannah laid her head on Justin’s shoulder and sighed.

“It’ll be fine,” she said.  “Josie is strong.”

“You talked to Beth,” he said, knowing full well that she had back in Savannah, even before she admitted it.  “You heard what she’s like.  She’s crazy.  I’m afraid Josie won’t be able to handle her.”

“Beth won’t get anywhere near Josie without you knowing it,” Hannah said.

“Don’t be so sure,” Justin said, snorting.  “Beth will find a way.”

Hannah wrapped her arms around his waist.  “The porch does look good.  Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, but as I recall, you mentioned something about paying me back for it?”

“I don’t recall anything of the sort,” she said haughtily.

“Yeah, you’re right, you didn’t.  But I know you will.”

“Oh, really?  And how do you propose I do that?  I won’t become your slave, if that’s what you’re thinking.”

He laughed.  “No...but I do accept people as payment.”

“People?” she asked, gawking up at him.  

“Little people,” he explained.  “As in squirmy little people.”

She frowned, confused.

“Babies, Hannah...I’m talking about our babies.  Remember?  Six installments?”

“You’re crazy.  I am not paying you in babies.”

“Only crazy about you,” he said, grinning.  “How about we go work on the first payment now?”

“You’re crazy and insatiable,” she complained good-naturedly.  “Is sex all you think about?”

“Well, there have been studies about that...”

“I’m in love with a male nympho,” she groaned to herself.  “Sometimes a girl needs a break.”

He tilted his head down to gaze seriously at her.  “Hell, Hannah...I’m sorry.  Do you need a break?”

She smiled as she smoothed his shirt over his chest.  “No.”

“You little minx,” he moaned and pulled her up into a kiss.  “Don’t tease me like that.”

She swayed from the after-effects of his kiss.  “Mmm...maybe a sex-slave...I think I can manage that, at least.”

“Now, who’s insatiable?” he asked, but didn’t wait for an answer.  Into the house, he carried her, up the stairs, to the bedroom, and they didn’t come out until morning.

*****

As Justin sat on the steps of the new porch, reading over some papers that Jack Bruens couriered to him the next morning, Hannah stood in the middle of the front yard, hands on hips, brow furrowed, as she scrutinized the paint colors for the wood siding and exterior trim.  The painting contractor stood next to her.

"You sure you want to go with the pink?" the contractor, Mitzy, by name, asked uncertainly.

"The original color was pink," Hannah replied absently, but Justin noticed how she grimaced.  She was trying, he mused.  Trying to keep the house as it had always been -- the home built by her grandfather -- and still make it hers.

She didn't like the pink.

Not the shade of bright, shell pink it had originally been.  Thankfully, the vibrancy had faded over the years.

No, Justin watched as her eyes lovingly continued to graze across the section of siding that had been painted an alternative color...a dusky rose with accents of a warm brown and an off-white.   That was the one she liked.  It was her compromise, he presumed, to her family's legacy.  

Honestly, Justin didn’t care if she spray-painted the entire house with graffiti and tie-dye swirls.  If it made her happy, he was happy...pink house and all.  

Hannah sighed.  “I just can’t do it...I have to go with the rose and brown.  That other one just makes my eyes hurt.  What was my grandmother thinking back then?”

“It was a very popular color,” Mitzy replied, writing out the order form for the chosen colors.  

“It’s hideous,” Hannah said, and Justin silently agreed.  The papers in his hands were forgotten as he had been watching Hannah for the last few minutes.  She was just so damn beautiful to him.  Her cut-off, denim shorts hugged her hips and bottom to perfection, showcasing those lean, tan legs of hers.  And her green tank top enhanced the upper portion of her figure just as marvelously.  But it wasn’t the minimum clothing or the way they fit that kept Justin’s eyes on her.  

Every flicker of her eyelashes.  Every twitch of her ears as she smiled.  Every tap of her fingers on her hips and nibble of her bottom lip as she continued to think over the exterior of her house...he loved.  The emotion expanded so vastly inside him, he wondered how he’d ever be able to contain it.  Or how other people had managed to fall in love and not die from the sheer joy and fire inside them.

A year.  A whole, freaking year.  He was impatient.

Yesterday afternoon, while they were driving back from Georgia and had stopped at a restaurant for lunch, Justin had wondered about something Hannah said to him.  Her birth control pills.  Would it really take a year for the hormones to clear out of her body and she’d be able to get pregnant?

So, there he sat at that diner’s booth, while Hannah hopped into the bathroom, and he quickly Googled birth control pills.  Two to four weeks, but an average of six months, the website he looked at had said.  She could be pregnant within the next month.

And she didn’t care if they were married or not.

But he did.

“Damn,” he muttered to himself.  If Justin had his way, they’d be married tomorrow, but he still hadn’t had time to find her a ring and plan the perfect proposal.  The one Hannah was counting on and expecting from him.

Well...what are you doing right now, you jackass?

Justin sat upright, fisting the papers in one hand.  Yeah, why not go ring shopping now?  Hannah was heading into work in a little while.  Josie was still at the farm.  They were all having dinner with his parents tonight.  His plans for today included the reading homework from Jack and video-conferencing with a realtor in Savannah so he could find a few potentional homes for Chad and his family.

He had an hour or two to spare.

Coming off the porch, his feet created a determined stride toward Hannah.  "Songbird, you okay for a while?  I have some errands to run."

Hannah snorted as she rolled her eyes and grinned.  "I'm sure I can get to work without you holding my hand.  Are we still having dinner at the farm?"

"As far as I know."

"Okay, then I'll meet you there about six."

“I’ll be back before then and we can go together.”

Hannah shook her head.  “There’s no need--”

Justin pulled her into a kiss and shut her up.  “I insist,” he said against her lips.  Hannah licked at the taste of him as she moaned and clutched at his shoulders.

“You can’t kiss me like that in public,” she said, her voice thick, “and expect me to just walk away.  It isn’t fair.”

He grinned.  “I’ll be back before you get home.”

She pressed her forehead to his chest and sucked in a breath.  Then she stepped away, smoothing some flyaway hairs into her ponytail.  Her knees wobbled as she walked up to her porch and into her house.

Mitzy, the painter -- who looked to be in her mid-forties -- grinned at Justin.  “Can I have a kiss, too?”

“You get that house painted within the week and under budget, and I’ll give you a dozen,” he said, teasing her.  But then, his promise caught up with his brain, and he stopped and thought, Maybe I should clear that with Hannah first...  He shouldn’t be going around kissing strange women just to get what he wanted.  He never had before.

“Um, on second thought,” he said sheepishly to Mitzy, who smiled knowingly at him and said, “I was kidding.  You and Hannah are cute together.  I miss that kind of playfulness in my own marriage, so I was a bit jealous and facetious about it.  No harm done.”

“Thanks,” Justin said, and headed toward his truck.  But he stopped one more time.  “Hey, Mitzy...”

“Yeah?”

“Invest in some silk scarves and a cowgirl hat...your husband won’t mind playing then.”

Mitzy turned a shade brighter than the pink on the house.  “Way too much insight,” she declared, “but I’ll give it a shot.  Thanks.”

“No problem.”

Backing out of Hannah’s drive, Justin set his mind on his task.  Find a ring.  But what kind?  And from where?

“Crap,” he muttered as he pulled over to the side of the road.  He dialed Mark.  “I’ve got a shotgun to my back,” he said to Hannah’s friend and father.  “Where do I get the ring?”

Mark laughed out loud and said, “Downtown on Oak.  Fletcher’s.”

“Thanks.  Don’t tell Hannah.”

“My lips are sealed,” Mark said, and Justin drove the short distance to the downtown area.  Two hours later, he was still standing in the middle of the jewelry shop, staring and deliberating between two rings, in much the same way Hannah had contemplated house colors that morning.

The lady behind the counter was patience incarnated.  She smiled and left him alone when he needed to think, but she was right there the second he had a question or wanted to see another ring out of the display case.  

But he just couldn’t decide.

One was the standard solitaire diamond.  Two carats.  Princess cut.  Not too big that it would hamper her while working, but big enough to show the world that she was taken, possessed, loved.

It was the perfect ring for an ordinary, normal, traditional proposal.

But the other ring...it was a creation of the store’s owner.  A rose-hued diamond cut into a teardrop shape and set into a band of white gold and platinum.  It was surrounded with tiny round, white diamonds, and the matching wedding bands -- both the bride’s and the groom’s -- were wide and studded with more small stones.  There wasn’t another ring set like it in the world.  

That one also told the world that she was taken and possessed by someone who loves her, but one additional statement came with it...she was adored.

“I don’t know,” he said for about the twentieth time.  “I can’t decide.”

He looked at the solitaire.  It winked at him in the store’s light.  It told him...”Buy me...She could use something normal for a change.”

His eyes went back to the pinkish-brown teardrop.  “Think of me as a symbol of the last lonely tear she’ll ever wear.  I’m exactly what she wants.”

“I didn’t think it would be this hard,” he said to himself, but the woman behind the counter smiled and said, “That is a sign you will make the right decision.”

Traditional diamond ring...”Everyone will know immediately why she wears me...”

Rose ring...”But only you and her should really care...I am unique, just like her...”

“I am simple, the way love should be...”

“Love is beauty, and that is me...”

“I can be upgraded, if she wants something bigger...”

“But I am the ring that should be passed down to younger generations...I have a story to tell...”

“Okay, stop!”  Justin put his hands over his head to shut out the arguing voices inside his skull.  This is ridiculous.  

The lady smiled again.  She’d seen this kind of behavior in anxious men before.  

“If she doesn’t like this one, can we bring it back and exchange it?” he asked.

“We have a thirty-day, no-fuss guarantee.  It’s quite common for the woman to come back and choose her own.”

Justin frowned.  He didn’t want Hannah to come back and choose her own.  He wanted to get it right the first time.  He gazed solemnly at the ring in his hand and the one still on the counter.  

“I think...”

Which one?

“I’ll...”

I could use a little help here, God.

“...take...

Simple or unique?  Traditional or symbolic?  Which one?  Which one?  She’ll wear it for the rest of her life.

“...this one,” he said, thrusting his decision across the counter, and the lady nodded.

“Good choice.”  She boxed it up and Justin paid for it.  There was no turning back now, no changing his mind.

Now, he just had to worry about when to ask her.