XLIII - Dead Reckoning

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n. to find yourself bothered by someone's death more than you would have expected, as if you assumed they would always be part of the landscape, like a lighthouse you could pass by for years until the night it suddenly goes dark, leaving you with one less landmark to navigate by—still able to find your bearings, but feeling all that much more adrift.

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I couldn't sleep that night. Edgy with the knowledge that a battle between Goyo and a few of his soldiers at Tirad will be against to how many American soldiers are currently camping at the foot of Mount Tirad now. The knowledge that they'll be very outnumbered, despite having the high ground, makes survival impossible. And then, I remember that time that I've found a book about Goyo's life and death in Gregory's possession. I just didn't know back then that this is how it is going to end; and how dejected the situation is. And the knowledge still surprise me that at his death, the game is also to end.

Keeping my shawl to keep me warm in the cold December breeze, I head out of the hut to sit at the bench just next to it. My eyes will wander on to the direction that the soldiers had trailed on to reach the trenches they've made at Tirad. And my wild thoughts give me an idea to head there. But I know that I will not be able to do so: I've decided to stay. Because Goyo also asked me, even without saying it out loud, for me to stay here.

"Hmm? Binibining (Y/N)?"

I turn to the direction of the voice, seeing Doctor Simeon Villa with a small smile. I smile in return. "Magandang gabi, Doktor Villa."

"Hirap po makatulog?" he asks me.

I nod a little, drawing my shawl closer around me.

"Siguro po ay nangangamba po kayo sa magiging kahihinatnan ng laban, ano po? Lalo na't mapanganib ang naghihintay po kala Heneral."

"Iba ang pakiramdam ko kumpara noong mga nakaraan na labanan." I instinctly touch my neck, remembering that I've already returned the necklace given to me by Goyo before, and I smile in remembering that at least, the anting-anting he'd given me is now back to protect him, if ever. "Hindi ko magawang maipaliwanag."

"Hindi niyo po kailangan magpaliwanag sa akin, Binibini. Itong mga nakaraang linggo, napansin ko po na talagang malapit po kayo sa Heneral. Naging usap-usapan din po ng mga sundalo ni Heneral Goyo na kahit noong nasa Dagupan pa lamang po ay talagang magaan na ang loob niyo sa isa't isa. Pero, ang ipinagtataka ko lang po, kung hindi niyo mamasamain... maging ang pagtataka ng mga sundalo, may liniligawan daw po ang Heneral sa Dagupan?"

"A-Ah..." I blush. "W-Wala namang namamagitan sa aming dalawa. Kaya..." I sigh. "Nakakahiya na kami ang pinaguusapan ng mga sundalo."

He bites back a chuckle. "Subalit, kung ako po ang tatanungin? Sa tagal ng pagsasama niyo ni Heneral, at kung sadyang kaibigan ang turingan niyo sa isa't isa... mukhang naglolokohan lang po tayo dahil sa mga kinikilos po ni Heneral? Mukhang mas may malalim na ugnayan pa."

I smile softly, looking at him. "Maraming salamat, Doktor Villa. Naiintindihan ko. At... naintindihan ko na rin kung ano ang nais niya talaga iparating. Ang masasabi ko lamang... kung totoo man o hindi, may mas matimbang sa puso niya."

Doctor Villa blinks and looks at me, a little bit confused with my words, and I shake my head to give closure to the topic.

The two of us hear the door of the hut creek open, and exiting is none other than but the President himself with a mug on one hand. It is Doctor Villa who immediately asks him, no formalities said, "Hindi rin po kayo makatulog?"

I didn't hear President Aguinaldo's response, but the silence that followed us is enough as we wait for the morning sky.

And some news from the Pass.

Dead Reckoning - A Gregorio del Pilar x Reader storyWhere stories live. Discover now