44 - The Like

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I sneeze as dust and the scent of damp wood fill my nose in the little woodshed Reign shifted us to. The light filtering in through the dirty windows reveals shelves lined with woodworking tools and a variety varnishes. An unfinished, hand-carved rocking horse sits on a table against the back wall of the cramped space. "Where are we?" I ask, turning to him.

He lifts his chin towards a window.

Across an overgrown yard, there's a wide deck and the back façade of an ocean blue house. I gasp. Looking back at the rocking horse, my heart beats a little faster.

"I think it was meant for you," Reign says.

I run my fingers over the dusty saddle, too stunned to really process it. "How did you know this was here?"

He turns to look out the window. "When you up and stopped talking to me, I started coming to the house every day to look for you," he says. "I happened to wander back here a couple days ago, and I found the shed."

"You came here to look for me?"

He blushes. "I told you, B: I wanted to know you were okay. After hearing about Cole paying you a visit... he was just trying to scare you, you know? I wanted to make sure you knew that. Your family has a bit of a reputation—"

"What do you need to tell me, Reign?" I'm suddenly desperate for him to get to the point.

His mouth clamps shut and he looks at the floor.

"Oh no you don't, Shadowboy. You are not going silent on me now."

"I really wish you wouldn't call me that, B," he says quietly. "This is hard enough without being reminded of why I can't be with you."

And there goes the rest of my heart. Usurpation complete.

He fills his cheeks with air and scratches his head as he blows it out. "Do you remember the first day of school?"

I snort. "How could I forget, Casanova?"

He laughs, his Shadow eyes dancing with their incongruous light. "See. That's exactly it."

"Yeah, not following," I say. "What's exactly it?"

"You, Bliss," he says, stepping toward me. "Like I told you at the park, there's always been something about you. From that very first day, I could tell you were nothing like the other girls I'd... been involved with." His cheeks flush, and he looks away. "I was so used to getting my way, you know? I could be a total jerk to people, and they still did whatever I wanted them to. But you were so... different. It intrigued me."

"Ah, so that's why you were stalking me in the woods like a creepy, old pervert." I fold my arms.

"Listen"—he takes another step toward me—"it was different then. You were the hot new chick with a bad attitude who obviously stood on her own two feet. I thought it was sexy."

I look away and clear my throat, suddenly self-conscious.

"But the more I studied you," he continues, "the more I realized you're so much more than that.

"When I was in those bushes after that fire, my conscience wouldn't shut up, B. I was in so much pain, and I was sure I was going to die. I sat there thinking about my life, and even the 'good' stuff, the stuff my parents brag about... it all seemed so pointless, you know?" He starts pacing back and forth across the shed, nibbling at the cuticle of his thumb. And then you came and just made everything worse."

"Well, excuse me for saving your life...."

He stops and looks at me. "You know that's not what I mean, Bliss. I'm just saying that after you helped me, I saw everything in a different light. All the stupid crap we do; all the innocent people we hurt; all the arrogance and disregard for humanity in general... like I said before, the fact that my enemy helped me after my friends left me behind really messed me up in the head. For the first time, I started to not only question being a Shadow, but to dislike it.

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