MAD

chvpter 18

WARNING 17+ - nothing graphic, just themes

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...

Violet Warrendale

...

"Jesus, Vi." He rasps, and I grab the counter because the hunger in his voice is nearly enough to make me change my mind and join him.

Pull it together.

I twist the tap and run my thumb over the toothbrush, washing my mouth before I splash my face with the cold water. "You were leaving the walls." I stand up, so my face is in the mirror, but I keep my gaze on my knuckles which grip the counter, "You're a hypocrite." Can he see my pink cheeks?

It's like his resolve snaps. "I was leaving the walls for a different fücking reason, I was leaving under Akimitsu's orders, not because I was some reckless brat who wanted to rip her daddy a new one."

I wrinkle my nose at his nasty accusation, "Reckless brat," I quote, "are you serious? Because last I checked, I never got caught. Last I checked, I've done a hell of a lot more to try and get out of here than you." I look up, glad the reflection cuts everything beneath his navel off.

"You nearly got yourself shot in the fücking process!" He barks, twisting the taps before roughing his hair out, "You resisted Wilkes, fückin' called his bluff when he was gon' pop you in the back of the head."

I imagine when Wilkes shoved his boot on my face as I kicked and spat or when he knocked me to my knees and rammed his gun to the back of my head. I wanted him to do it for a second. I didn't want to think about mum anymore.

"I didn't mean to call his bluff." I try to defend, but he squints in dismay.

"You," He chokes when he realises what I mean, but then his outrage triples, "Is that why you pulled the fückin' gun? With three Sergeants holdin' MGs at your head!" He explodes, grabbing the towel before he wraps it around his waist. "What the fück were you thinking Vi? Tryna get shot?"

I was thinking about when the bastard said he would rip my guts up like he did to my mother. I turn on him, "He was sayin' shīt in my ear," I croak, "I had to."

Water trickles down his jaw and along the ridges of his collarbone, but I don't let myself follow it. He glowers down at me, "You're reckless, you made yourself a target. Your daddy isn't here to bail you out no more. This isn't Lake Darling, an' fuck me if I'm skeptic cause you won' even fess to who the fuck is willing to pay 60k to get you out of here-."

My resolve shatters, and I shove his steaming chest, "No! Reid, this isn't Lake Darling! This is a sick fücking baby factory!"

"But you knew!" He accuses. "You knew they were going to take us! All this bullshit with your father, acting like you're innocent of it!" Reid towers over me, but I hold my ground, glowering up at him even when tears brim my eyes, my mind racing faster than I can bear. 

"I don' think you fucking understand! I would give everything to go back and change that night—." I cut myself off with a sharp inhale, hating when images of Mal attacking me flickers in my head. I should've let Elias beat him to a pulp so he couldn't follow me. I never should've left myself in that position... I never should've gone home to get my gun. I could've saved mum.

"What?" His rage lapses when tears start running down my cheeks, "Vi, I don'—." I storm past him, wiping my face, but he grabs my wrist.

I cover my overwhelm with rage, "I, do not, know anything!" I snap, "And I've had enough of you looking at me like I'm in here on purpose! I don' know why you can't get that through your thick fucking skull!"