The Formidable

49

The thump of Jase's heart drowned out the sound of his thoughts. Almost. He stood at the front door to the house for what felt like forever, staring at the dark varnish and brass knocker, it's intricate detailing blurring in the centre of his vision. His eyes drifted down to the letterbox, drilled shut a long time ago to avoid any nasty deliveries. Mia rested her head on his shoulder, still having not made a sound. It was beginning to worry Jase, but the sickness of having to confront Madison, and tell her that he went through with Benny's demands, was currently swallowing everything that had ever been even remotely important to him.

Deciding he couldn't prolong the inevitable any longer, he twisted his key in the lock and stepped in, holding his breath. Madison was sat on the sofa, putting the front door in full view. At first she froze, struggling to process the sight before her. As if, for a moment, it was possible she'd fallen off the wagon far enough for it to be nothing more than a hopeful hallucination.

"Mia?" Her voice cracked as she flew across the room, taking her child from Jase with tears streaming down her cheeks. Mia said nothing, it began to dawn on Jase that she may not be as okay internally as she outwardly appeared. He watched Madison and Mia for a second before Madison stopped kissing Mia's unruly curls, her eyes now fixed on Jase.

"Where's my dad?" she asked.  Jase remained silent, feeling Sam and Janine's eyes on them as they assessed the situation. Madison grit her teeth. "I asked you a question," she pressed on, lowering Mia to the floor. She sensed the anger in her mum's voice and toddled to Janine who picked the infant up, taking her into the living room and closing the door behind her. "You didn't-" The words choked and died on her tongue.

Jase opened his mouth but no words came out. What could he say? He'd just handed over her fathers life to someone that wanted to bring them more pain and terror than they had already experienced. And Madison was catching the brunt of it all. Her face contorted slightly as it all hit her at once, shaking her head vigorously.

"No. No. No!"  She began to scream at him, just as he'd predicted, but what the fuck was he supposed to have done? He was one man and he couldn't solve every problem and save every life each time someone new cropped up and decided they wanted to take them out. "He was my dad, you bastard!"

Jase pressed his back up against the door as she beat his chest with her fists in a defeated frenzy, screaming incoherently at him. Now she cracked. Of all the things that had happened, losing her dad in such a permanent way was the thing that sent her over the edge. "I only just got him back!" Her voice was raw as it burst out of her into a heart-wrenching screech that hurt Jase's ears. Benny had finally achieved what he had set out to do years ago - he had broken her.

Sam looked at Jase over Madison's head with wide eyes, waiting for some kind of order but Jase shook his head as Madison eventually collapsed, heaving into his chest. He wrapped his arms around her tight, partially for his own sake so she would stop lashing out and because she desperately needed comforting.

The news of his own father's death hadn't come to him as a shock, and he had no emotional attachment to the man. He couldn't empathise and didn't do her the injustice of pretending to understand. The most he could do was relate on a surface level basis. Neither of them had either parent now, and both their dads had been deeply involved in the same business that killed them, but that was as far as it went.

Growing up, Madison had been close to her dad, he'd taught her everything she knew. She'd idolised him. Everything that aided her whilst she was in the house she'd learned from him. He'd inadvertently always been there, helping her survive, and now he was gone. She'd only began to resent him in the past few years because of the trouble that followed her due to his actions and now she would never get that time wasted hating him back. It felt as though her organs were turning inside out.