Short stories that might become more

Let me be weak! (submission/softness)

I've been the strong one for all my teen years, raised in a feminist household and pushed by my mom to always take charge no never show weakness to suppress any emotion, it hurt me but my oh so great mother would just scold me for my tears, scold me for not fitting her ridiculous idea of who I should be.

Now after years of putting up with the horrors of pretending, today I was finally free. I was moving in with my friend Amanda, she was the opposite of me, she had never been allowed any say in anything so of course our families would think that was how she would continue in the new place with me, but I had other plans and so did she. We had planned everything perfectly, we moved so far away that neither of our families could afford to bother us more that once a year at most. And that was needed as Amanda and me had a little secret. She treated me like a little toddler princess and I loved it.

I had my room furnished with a toddler-bed, the first new furniture I got after moving out, and a few beanbag chairs set around a childish table. A cute fluffy carpet on the floor and Disney princess curtains rounded up the little girl flair... Amanda walks into my room "okay princess, do you need mommy to help you with anything?" in that moment the dam burst, I sobbed a bit "yeah I need lots of snuggles mommy. Can I pretty please get a hug?" Amanda bend down a bit and hugged me allowing me to almost melt into her frame.

The hug felt so good, I knew it would be the first of many, I was finally free of that nagging pressure to be strong and 'independent' I hated that I needed comfort I wanted to let someone else take charge, to just be a little princess, and Amanda, she actually treated me like one, with her I could just drop all my walls and be myself. I enjoyed a lot of 'childish' things like kids cartoons, plushies and coloring books. At first glance my room looked like a five year old girls at most. And it was in a way how I felt in that moment, finally being small, being weak, another wave of cries rack my body and Amanda gently pats my back "shh it's okay princess mommy's got you, just let it all out and then you go take a nap okay..."

I managed to calm down a bit more and Amanda handed me a plushie to snuggle up with while she would set up the rest of the apartment. I knew Amanda had never been allowed to do things on her own and now she could do everything for me and herself all on her own. It was as liberating for her as it was for me, with those thoughts I laid in my toddler-bed hugging my teddy. This was it, now more showoff facade, just dropping down and being weak, no more pretending, just being able to freely cry when I felt hurt of overwhelmed, no more getting scolded for my tears, just a warm soft embrace by a caring mommy... Just being myself, being weak and soft and needing someone to take care of me. I knew this would help me heal and maybe someday be able to actually forget about my old house for it was definitely never a home.

I fell asleep hugging my teddy tighter and thinking of this new life, a life of softness and in a way submission, I would let Amanda take charge of everything.