FINDING June

13. {Un-directional}

I sat down in the kitchen that evening because it was the closest place to the fridge. I opened another bag of chips as I stared at the movie Lisa played for me on her laptop.

A wave of nostalgia hit me as the movie ended. It was those kinds of movies that made you think about what it felt like to love and be loved, to feel seen and actually be seen.

I wondered for a little longer that I didn't notice anyone enter.

"You live here?" I looked up to find one of Jesse's friends from the other day. Apparently, they weren't actually his friends, they were project partners from college that he just met. And that was why Jesse was annoyed when Lisa called them his friends.

I ignored his question and fixed my gaze on the laptop as the movie started again hoping he would take that as his cue to not try to talk to me.

"You didn't hear me, I asked if you lived here." He repeated coming closer to the table, his hands in his pocket.

"N-no? I'm just crashing," I looked up from the laptop and answered him.

He nodded his head with a smile, "How old are you?"

"19."

"Cool, wanna hang tonight?" He asked again, he was now standing beside me as he took my hands in his. "I know a really good place."

"I-I don't want to," I answered him as I closed the laptop, knowing I was going to bolt any second from then.

"Come on, it will be fun, I can make you feel good," He started to rub my back with a smile on his face, "I like your hair." I stood up and yanked his hands off me. I hated the way his hands felt against my skin.

"You're not supposed to see me. You're supposed to not look at me twice," I started to whisper to myself. "You're supposed to detest the way I look."

"Detest?" His voice was low as he approached me. "You're just the way I like it, thick," he answered as he came forward again and took my hands. His second hand started to caress my body and just when I was about to scream help, I heard,

"Motherfucker! what are you doing to her!"

The person was yanked from my front and I looked up to find a furious Jesse.

"Chill Jesse, it's not your sister. And she's not even a minor, she can decide for herself," That person replied as Jesse grabbed his collars.

"I'm going to kill you," he punched the guy in his face. The guy got furious and blowed Jesse in his stomach.

As Jesse immediately regained his balance, he pounced on the guy and punched him. He did it again and again until his knuckles were white and blood was smeared on his cloth. I wanted him to continue hitting him. I could only see Oliver in that guy's face so no amount of beating they gave him sufficed.

"God, what happened!" Lisa came into the kitchen, confused as she tried to stop Jesse from hitting the guy.

"He touched her," Jesse spat as he took the boy's lifeless body to the ground to throw him some more punches.

"Oh my God, June are you okay?" She rushed to where I sat down and tried to assess my body. I didn't know what to tell her, I knew numb wasn't okay.

The third person who was Jesse's project partner came into the kitchen to stop Jesse from committing murder as he tore him off of the other guy.

"You better scram, don't let me find you," Jesse threatened him with a furious hiss.

Both of the guys walked out of the kitchen and out of Lisa's house. It was the moment Jesse looked back at me that I realized how I shouldn't be here.