21. {Scars and no beautiful}

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As kids, when we got hurt, our parents scolded us and treated the wound until it healed. As we grew older, we knew the kinds of wounds that we showed our parents, it was those ones that healed fast. Because there were some wounds, that never healed, but instead turned into nasty scars that served as constant reminders of the trauma that we survived.

"Who battered him this way?" the head officer turned and asked us.

Why?"I turned back to the person. "You don't think he deserves it?" I asked him, the dried tear itching the skin of my face.

"No, I think you didn't do enough, even. Take him out of here," he commanded the officers as he led them out and acknowledged my Father along the way.

I fell to my feet as soon as Oliver was escorted out of the room. The world seemed to be spinning around me, I still wasn't sure of what had just happened. The same thing happening thrice, wasn't that a curse?

My mother came rushing to me, "It's okay darling, it's finally over." She hugged me and cried, my sight gradually becoming blurry as I looked up to her.

"Peter! Grab the car keys, she needs a doctor," I heard her call for my father and it finally seemed like the life could seep out of me now. So I let it.

•••••

As I gradually opened my eyes to find myself in the hospital, I knew that I must have passed out because I didn't remember anything about driving here.

Jace perched his hands on the edge of the bed and placed his head on it. Jade sat on the chair with her phone in her hand as her sleepy eyes were fixated on the screen. As I turned to my other side, I found Jesse sitting down on the couch, his head on the wall as he seemed like he had just finally drifted to sleep.

"Where's Mom and Dad?" I turned to Jade who finally looked up from her phone. The excitement on her face from hearing my voice completely disappeared within seconds.

"Went out to see the doctor in charge," she responded turning back to her phone.

With the way she yawned, you could tell she didn't sleep or didn't get enough sleep and I found myself wondering. So I decided to ask.

"Why'd you do that? Why'd you save me? I thought you hated me," I started and that made her stop pressing on her phone.

She then turned to me with a quick glance, "I do. But I'm the only jerk who's allowed to make your life miserable."

"How did you know to hit Oliver?" I asked her again.

"I saw what he did to you that day and Lisa confirmed it," she told me.

'You can't blame me for this, you'll have to burn in the fire that your sister lit' Oliver's words replayed in my head as I wondered how Jade could be so carefree about it.

"Did you ever stop to think that he came back because of what you did to him," I asked her again.

"Yes, and now he's been caught and he can finally rot in hell like he deserves to," she answered me.

•••••

I spent three days at the hospital before getting discharged.

I felt sharp pains in my ribs as Jace helped me climb out the car. As we walked into the house, I looked up to see cameras installed on every corners in the living room, the stairs and the hallway.

As I entered to see my room arranged and back to normal again with a new lock on my door and a more advanced one on the window, together with the red distress button. I locked the window first and then blocked out the light entering through the curtains.

I didn't know who initiated the change in the wallpaper of my room. The blinding blue decor was gone, my room was now painted in a monotone color. It was a color that didn't lie to me about what has happened to me, it didn't lie about what has happened in this room.

I stood in front of the mirror, tracing through the cuts on my face, both from long ago and the ones of recent. The bandage didn't do the work of hiding it from sight. As I looked at the bandage, I wondered if the world accepted of this. Three times, no charm.

A knock came on my door and my mother peeked in without entering.

"You okay?" She asked me and knowing that I was far from okay, I nodded anyways. "I tried telling the Parker boy that now's not the right time, but he insisted on seeing you," she told me.

"Okay," I answered her.

I looked back to the mirror and wondered why Jesse chose to stay. Jesse has done enough for me, I couldn't simply ask for more. If he decided to abandon me at this point, there needed no explanation for it.

Didn't he know, that he couldn't see me like this? Oliver had been arrested, didn't he realize? That he didn't have to protect me from him again. He didn't need to worry about needing to save me. Not anymore.

My heart thumped loudly as I walked down the stairs, Jesse was sat down on the couch backing me. As soon as he sensed my arrival, he stood up and tried to smile. I let my gaze wonder from his beautiful face as I passed and went to him.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him.

His smile faded and disappeared within milliseconds as his eyebrows lined up to a frown before he called my name, "June...,"

"Do you even care about me?" I asked him.

"Of course I do," he approached me but I backed away. "You know that."

"Then why do you not see that, this, whatever it is that's between us, it can't work?" I asked him.

He frowned again, this time not breaking contacts. "What are you saying?"

"You're too happy, full of life, the brightest colors," I started. "And then, there's me, broken. That doesn't go together, Jesse" I told him.

"Is anyone ever full on with the brightest colors, June?" He asked me, hoping to reach out to me.

"We're worlds apart, you need to open your eyes and see," I asked him again.

He didn't talk, only stared at me for a little while before he tore his gaze away from me. He stared at the ceiling while I fought back the tears threatening to spill any second.

"What about wanting to remain?" He looked back at me, the tears he was trying hard to hide now evident in his gaze.

"The want to remain isn't for someone like me," I answered him and turned back immediately to the stairs as the tears came falling.

I couldn't help it, I figured if I looked at him any second longer, I was going to run to him and tell him how I didn't want him to leave, how much I craved for his presence in my life because he was the only one that made me feel the want to remain.

But I couldn't drag him back because of me.

I loved him too much.

💨March 18th xx

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💨March 18th
xx

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