Pencils & Polaroids

47: gentle villains

"So you guys actually did it in the woods?" Sam grills her next question. 

We've been doing this back and forth for a while. Packing my books for tomorrow's class, I give her an implied nod. Sitting on the foot of our bed, she pulls her knees up and hugs them to her chest. Her caviling eyes pass a series of unspoken judgments. 

"You skipped lunch."

"No, I just ate really quickly." 

"Was this the thing you discussed with Sadie in the editing room later?" Her question makes me halt the process of arranging my pencil pouch. 

I turn to her, unsure how this affects our Qs and As. "Um, yeah. It was a passing conversation." 

"Been having a lot of those these days, huh?" 

I try to make sense of it and when I fail, I give her a questioning frown. "Is there a problem, Sam?" 

She shrugs shaking her head so confidently that I let the matter go. I resume packing my bag, picking out my outfit for tomorrow—overall shorts with a black tank top and a blue headband. After I'm done prepping, I get a tiny flutter of excitement in my heart with the thought of hurrying to the next room. 

Making another to-do list check, I dust my hands and then my ass, backing to the door. "Okay then, I'll see you--"

My words, my smile, and my flutters all come crashing down when I see Sam, sitting in the same position, with tears streaming down her cheeks. She wipes them away with her shoulders, hands still intertwined around her knees that are hugged to her chest. I don't understand, she said she was okay--and she's clearly not. 

I rush to her and sit beside her. I want to hug her but the thought that I was responsible for making her cry makes me wonder if me hugging her would worsen the damage. Hesitantly, I wait for her to cry it all out. 

"Sam," I tilt my head when the crying doesn't seem to stop anytime soon. 

She sobs, "No, I get it. You've made new friends, you have this guy keeping you occupied, and we're playing for different teams--I get it." 

I'm literally gawking. "What?" 

She wipes her nose. "You're moving on. I'm not your person anymore, you're finally making new friends, and trust me, Park, I am so happy for you. But I-I feel like I don't matter to you anymore. You've forgotten me. Y-You don't need me. And I think I'm starting to lose you." 

I want to laugh but I know she will slap me if I do so I hold it in. "What did you drink before coming here?" 

She blinks in confusion. "I had Chai, it was today's dinner special, why?" 

"Because someone definitely spiked it." Immediately, she rolls her eyes and smacks a pillow on my head. "Only that would explain the deranged set of words you spoke about me moving on and forgetting you." 

Now, she's not sad anymore. She's angry. "You talk with Sadie like you're both best friends for such a long time. Every time I see you both together, I have murderous thoughts." 

"For her or for me?" 

"Park!" She yells into the pillow. "You are my person. I cannot see you with any other girl who's so evidently trying to get into our circle." 

"Circle?" I gesture to her and me. "This is more like a line. Point A to Point B--"

"You really want to object to my idioms right now?" She fumes with red blazing fury when she looks up from the pillow. "After you've cheated on me all week with that she-puppy under my damn nose?"