✯Subete Anata No Mono✯

Chapter 4

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30 April

I woke up, showered, dressed and turned the lock on the door.

"I'm off."

It is a strange feeling saying this to no one, however, I've always wanted to say these words. Even if to no one though. Experiencing things like these provides me with wonder and reminds me of the awareness that I am now free.

Indeed I feel a certain freshness in those words, knowing that I will never actually say them to my family.

I entered the elevator and went downstairs. The sound of the elevator descending to the first floor beeped as I measured my path toward the school.

The spring winds danced along with my brown hair, while the fresh air filled my lungs to capacity, I felt my brain oxygenate instantly.

"Japan is truly a breathtaking country from the outside huh."

Mumbles escaped out of my mouth.

I didn't meet anyone along the way, not that I was actually expecting anything or that it bothered me in any way. I am someone who has no need for friends, although I have a desire to have them in order to know what true friendship is all about.

Nor I managed to form any particular bond with Horikita or anyone in the class. 

The rest of the class, on the other hand, thinks I'm a lonely weirdo who is either an otaku ;I don't even know what it is; or some unsocial creep who is bored with life. They likely think this way because of my expression and my lack of ability to express emotions.

"Haaaaaah."

Horikita is not the type with whom friendship will enter into effect there quickly, she is a person who prefers to avoid such connection at all costs, well at least that is my guess.

When I told her I wanted to make friends, she assumed I was an apathetic pitiful little man and said to stay away as much as I can.

I'm not even going to deny it because she was right, at least in a part of it. I am hopeless as far as forming bonds is involved.

Though it hurt.

Not counting Kushida here because we are more classmates than friends. Adding Kushida to my friends list, knowing her only on a school break level is too pitiful even for me.

Why?

"Uhh."

Since Kushida is a friend of the whole school, there is no way I could possibly deceive myself and call her a friend out of pure heart just because I exchanged a few sentences with her. I'm not that desperate okay?

It would seem, however, that I am not that unfortunate.

Nothing more misleading, however.