| The Jabberbird | THG |

Chapter 10

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blackbird singing in the dead of night/ take these broken wings and learn to fly

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Peeta  

I shiver as the prep team pulls a heavy white jumper over my bare chest, the material is soft on my skin but I know it is stronger that it looks. They buckle hard armour onto my elbows, and fit me with a vest made from similar material, as light an autumn leaf, but still it doesn't deceive me. I know one of Katniss' arrows would merely glance off its perfectly designed surface.

They made the Jabberbird suit white, instead of black, I notice disconnectedly. I guess to show that I'm not Katniss, but i see it still has hints of wings in the design, so to show we're not abandoning her completely, although most people have.

It was meant for her, all this, meant for Katniss. I've seen Cinna's book. I've seen the bow. All useless now I've stepped in to fill her shoes. The citizens of Thirteen were informed as soon as I decided to help. Some strong people, the ones unaffected by the things she said in her interview, whisper behind my back and give me looks in the corridors, as if to say who are you? You're not her, you're not our Mockingjay.

I would be hurt but I'm thinking these things myself, thinking how I can't be anything like her. I can move people with my words, but a revolution needs actions to inspire people, not words yelled in a studio from a boy who can barely even sleep at night. Katniss had something in the things she did that made people want to fight, and I don't believe I can mimic that, no matter how much the people around me are trying to make it happen.

I lift my eyes from my boots as someone gently takes my hand. Annie. One of the few things I'm grateful Coin has given me here is her. They let her out of hospital for the express reason that she helped to calm me down, and I don't think I could do this without her. She smiles at me silently and murmurs that she's to take me to the stage. I follow. As her face turns away from me I see her eyes are shining. Despite how strong she tries to be, I know she's just as hurt by her loss as I am by mine, she's just better at hiding it.

I know it's terrible, but I envy her. I envy her having spent so much time with Finnick in District Four, to know that she was loved, and to have been with him for as long as she was. Alone together, as happy as they could be in this harsh world. At least she has real memories of being with him to hang on to, whereas all the ones I have with Katniss I spent with the knowledge that it could all have been a lie. I won't say it wasn't worth it, but if I knew for certain, I might have held onto my crumbling sanity when I lost her.

My train of thought breaks when Annie turns suddenly and takes me into a huge brightly lit room. The smell of fresh paint hits my nostrils and I know this is a new construction. Most of the room is dominated by a round black stage, surrounded partially by metal panels. I turn around to tell Annie that I don't think I can do this, that nothing i can say will help, but when I do, she isn't there. I see movement in the corner of my eye and turn to see Plutarch pointing to the stage from behind a glass window.

"Just over here Soldier" He announces over a speaker.

I slowly walk towards the stage, conscious of the camera's on me but not turning towards them. When I step onto the platform I notice a screen next to it, I recognize it to be a capitol broadcast, something about the weather.

"What's the TV for?" I say

"The TV? Oh, that's just to see if any of our broadcasts gets through to the capitol. Beetee designed the defence system for their TV network, but he's having trouble getting through. But when we do, you'll see it" I see him smiling enthusiastically through the glass, i try to do the same, but my lips won't form the shape.

"Okay" I mumble.

"Alright Peeta, you've been told the line right?" I nod in reply.

"Don't worry you'll be doing more than this when we get the feel for it, but for now I just want you to look at the camera, and say the line. Say it... say it like you've just won a battle, is that good?" I see him raise his eyebrows through the window and I nod again, not worried that this is too little at all.

"Ok, lighting? Cameras? Let's get the background up aaaand, great. Here we go Soldier"

"People of pane-" The words come out a quiet croak and I clear my throat.

"Sorry, sorry" I say louder.

"People of Panem we fight we dare we end this hunger for justice!" The words feel over thought, somebody in thirteen obviously spent way too much time thinking of this.

I see Plutarch wince "That was...good Peeta, but we want amazing, maybe raise your right arm in the air, shout it maybe, make people believe it, huh? Wouldn't Ka-" He breaks off, wide eyed. I know what he was going to say, and why he stopped. No-one mentions her around me anymore, too afraid that i'll freak out. My condition before I saw her interview was no secret, and people now treat me like I'm dying.

But he is right, she would want me to do this. Probably... I think I know her well enough to say that, although sometimes I'm not sure I knew her at all.

I exhale slowly and dip my head in Plutarch's direction.

I raise my left fist in the air and shout with all the courage and bravery I don't have:

"People of Panem. We fight, we dare, we end this hunger for justice!"

Keeping my hand in the air, I slowly point my first three fingers to the sky.

A/N- i like being dramatic, okay. 

to the one or even non-existent person who is reading this, thanks anyway.

xo

Lyric- Blackbird, The Beatles