Between Two Minds

Part 4

We finish our meal in silence. As our plates near emptiness, Gabriel inquires, "Would you like to watch a movie?" I contemplate the offer, but a heavy fatigue creeps over my body, whatever happened must have really taken a toll on my health or maybe I was always weak to begin with. Who knows. I shake my head softly, my eyelids heavy. "No, I think I'm getting tired. Maybe I should head to bed." Gabriel nods, understanding. "Of course, I'll walk you to your room."

While walking down the hallway, my eyes wander to the artwork and photos adorning the walls. They all depict landscapes and seascapes, but none of them feature people. It strikes me as odd, given the size of the manor, that there are no family photographs or portraits.

We reach my room, and he asks, "Is there anything else you need before I leave?"

"No, I think I'll be okay." I say smiling gently.

"Alright then, sleep well, Viola," he says, beginning to turn away. But before he can leave, I call out to him, my voice barely a whisper.

"Hey, Gabriel," I begin, uncertainty tainting my words, "What if I never regain my memories? What if I never discover who I am or what happened to me?"

Gabriel must sense my fear, so he responds reassuringly, "Don't worry, the amnesia may not be permanent, and I will try to help you in every way I can. In the meantime, let's focus on taking care of you and healing your body." I nod, finding comfort in his words, and he offers me a small, reassuring smile before bidding me goodnight. As I lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling, I can't help but feel a sense of unease. Why have my memories abandoned me? And why is Gabriel seemingly the sole caretaker of my existence?

A few minutes later, the sound of my door creaking open interrupts my thoughts, and I sit up in bed, startled. Gabriel pokes his head in, looking apologetic.

"Sorry to bother you again," he says softly, "but I forgot to mention something earlier."

"What is it?"

Gabriel's voice carries warmth as he speaks, "The library you were in earlier is all yours. You can use the room as you please if that helps."

"That sounds great. Thank you, Gabriel." I say and give him a small smile. He nods and leaves the room, closing the door gently behind him.

The following morning, I wake up to the sound of birds chirping outside my window. As much as I would like to enjoy it, my head seems to be in a constant state of dizziness nowadays. So, I head straight to the shower, hoping the warm water might clear the mental fog that has become a daily companion.

The bathroom, like the rest of the manor, adheres to the green and white theme, stocked with an array of luxury products. I choose a fancy lavender scented shampoo attempting to untangle the knots in my hair. Giving up on the unruly curls, I move on to shave and freshen up before stepping out.

Adjacent to the bathroom door, I notice another, smaller door leading to a walk-in wardrobe. 'Fancy,' I think to myself. Who puts a walk-in wardrobe in a guest room? Only the rich people, I guess. That takes me back to thinking about my past. Had I once belonged to the privileged, or was I among those who struggled to make ends meet? The unanswered questions weigh on my mind, leaving me with an unsettled sigh.

I scan the wardrobe, only to discover that I have exhausted the two sets of clothing Linda had provided. With a groan, I lament my oversight. Having nothing to wear after my shower was a predicament I hadn't anticipated. I walk towards my bed and ring the bell desperately hoping that Linda was back. But of course, she isn't. Gabriel is the one who knocks on my door before calling my name, "Viola, do you need something? Should I come in?", he asks. Before I can answer, the door creaks open a couple of inches, and in a moment of panic, I jump onto the bed, a reflexive attempt to shield myself, and I exclaim, "Wait, wait, don't open the door!"

Gabriel halts midway, his gaze inadvertently falling upon me. I really am dumb! I should have run towards the bathroom but instead, jumped on the bed and am now sitting on my knees. Flustered, I clutch the towel around me, which now feels insufficient.

Gabriel's eyes roam over my body for a briefly, before he clears his throat and looks away before speaking, "I picked out a few sets of clothes but forgot to put them in here yesterday, my apologies. I'll get you something to wear." With that, he practically runs downstairs. I breathe a sigh of relief and walk over to close the door. Moments later, another knock comes, and I crack the door open only enough to accept the clothing from Gabriel, quickly shutting it once more.

Through the door, Gabriel's voice carries an apology, "I'm sorry about earlier. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable." A smile forms on my lips, and I reply, "It's alright. Thank you for bringing these."

"No problem," he says, "Just let me know if you need anything else." With that, I hear him walk down the hallway. I quickly get dressed and head downstairs, still feeling a bit disoriented from how the day started.

Upon entering the kitchen, I find Gabriel sitting at the table, sipping on a cup of coffee and as soon as our eyes meet, I can see him shifting in his seat. I walk up to the counter and awkwardly slip into the chair opposite Gabriel. As he pours a cup of coffee for me, he asks, "Have you been sleeping well?" and if I wasn't paying attention to his actions, I would have missed the slight tremble in his voice. I nod as a response and sip on my coffee.

"I have certain things to take care of in the city. I would have asked you to come, but it will be boring for you to sit in the car while I attend meetings and patients. However, do you want me to get you something?" he adds to which I reply, "No, thank you. I have everything I need right here, except for my memories, of course" trying to lighten the mood and it works. He smiles for the first time since morning.

he remarks playfully. I chuckle in response, the sound unfamiliar and comforting all at once. Gabriel continues, "Your laugh is quite lovely", catching me by surprise and quickly adds, "it's just that I've heard it for the first time, and it sounds well... pretty. I don't mean to make you uncomfortable, if anything I thought me saying that would make you feel better about the situation, but I seem to have done the opposite. I am so..."

"Gabriel!", I interject cutting him off mid-sentence, "you are babbling, calm down. I know you don't mean to make me uncomfortable." He smiles as he shakes his head at his own awkwardness.

After we finish our coffee, we clean up the kitchen together. As he prepares to leave, he looks at me with a smile and says, "I should be back in a couple of hours. Make yourself at home in the meanwhile". As soon as he leaves, I make my way towards the library. I can't help but feel drawn to it. It is a beautiful room, with a cozy fireplace, and plush armchairs. It seems like the perfect place to relax and try to make sense of my jumbled thoughts.

This time when I enter, I decide to look around the room instead of the books and notice that there are no personal items or mementos to be found. The room clearly has the air of being used but like most of the manor, even here there's no life. Most of the manor has a feel of a certain disconnect or maybe it's just me that's disconnected. I immediately shrug off the unease, not wanting to spiral, and spend the better part of the morning browsing through the titles, pulling out books at random and flipping through the pages.