The War for Eventyr

22 | More Than

Sniffles broke through the silence. Trygve placed a slow and wary paw into the den. A tan fox hid in the shadows at the very back, her tail placed over her face to hide the tears.

Her ears perked at his footfalls. She didn't bother lifting her muzzle. "Go away, Darby. I want to be alone." The vixen groaned at him like she would her brother, though her voice was muffled with fur.

Trygve didn't leave. He didn't want her to be alone. The times he saw his best friend cry he could count on his paw pads, and it shattered his heart to know that he was one of them. Instead, he lay next to her, placing his back to hers and facing the wall. It hurt him even more to see her cry.

As his fur brushed against her, he felt her weight shift. Before she could lift her head and growl, he shushed her. "It's me, Dagny," he said. "And if you want me to leave, I will. But please, please, hear me out first."

Her body stilled, and the sniffles stopped. She didn't say anything, and he took it as his invitation to speak.

"I'm sorry that I hurt you. I didn't mean for anything to come between our friendship. I know that I let it." With each word, he could breathe easier. A weight lifted off his chest. "My head got stuck in the clouds, and I forgot where the ground was. I forgot what was important to me. Especially you, Dagny. You've always been there for me, supported my dumb dreams, called me out when I was being stupid. I needed that. And I still need you."

Air filled his empty lungs. He was nearly panting from the words he'd spoken in a single breath. Still, Dagny said nothing.

"I don't know what else to tell you," he pleaded, on the verge of tears himself. "What will it take for you to forgive me? Just say it, and I'll do it. I'm an idiot. I'm a moron. A scat-brained kit––"

"You aren't, Trygve." Her strained voice stopped him. It'd been a long time since she used his real name, at least in seriousness. He wondered what it meant for the words that came next. Feeling her bristling fur relax behind him, she let out a heavy sigh. "I'm the idiot, for blowing this all so out of proportion. I don't deserve an apology, only to be giving one. I couldn't just be happy for you..." Her voice trailed, growing into a forced whisper. She struggled to get the words out. "And then I made it all worse. I lied to Skadi, and I broke her heart too. All because I was jealous."

Trygve didn't know which words came at more of a shock. He chose to focus on the moment at paw. "Jealous?" he echoed. "What were you jealous of?"

A sound emerged behind him, somewhere in between a snort and a sob. Her head turned back and forth behind him. "What am I gonna do with you, Tree?"

His muzzle fell open just a little. The meaning came together, and his jaw quivered. "You were jealous of me... and Skadi?"

"Yes, you idiot." He could practically feel the eye roll in her voice, but it didn't outweigh the pain. "I love you. Or, I did."

Inside, he felt warm and crushed all at once. He stood, treading the couple steps to stand in front of her. Using a paw to pull her tail away from her face, he placed his muzzle on her neck. "I love you too, Dagny," he whispered back. "I'm sorry that it's just not in the same way."

Her glistening green eyes finally met him, and she licked away one of the tears that rolled down his cheek.

"I know. I've accepted it." She nodded, taking another deep breath while her eyes fluttered closed. Finally, she stood, and the two faced each other muzzle-to-muzzle.

Trygve smiled, and the faintest tug of joy matched it. "I really am an idiot, aren't I?" He couldn't help but laugh, awkwardly scratching an itch behind his ear.

Dagny hummed. They both knew it was true.

His eyes widened. "What did you say about Skadi?" he asked. "What did you tell her?"

She hesitated, her muzzle taking on another downcast look. "That you were just using her. That you didn't care about her," she admitted. "Tree, I know that isn't true, I was just upset––"

"No." He stopped her, licking his chops and wetting his tongue. "Because some of it is true. I haven't treated Skadi the way she deserves. But she has to know that it was always more than that."

Dagny smirked. She'd realized the obvious long before Trygve, and he chuckled to himself at the thought. "Um, right," she muttered, guilt still coating her words. "I heard that Skadi left. Someone saw her fleeing toward the Shadow Skulk."

Trygve stepped back. He searched her face to make sure she was serious. Apart from the things she'd told Skadi, Dagny never lied.

Why would she go home? When her skulk threatened to punish her––when they kicked her out in the first place? His mind flashed back to the morning he caught her sneaking back into their den, and another night where he'd woken and noticed that her scent was faint. Even if he couldn't see her in the darkness of the den, he should've known that she was gone.

Gone home, to report to her leader.

"Skadi..." He struggled to grasp the words. "She's a spy." His head spun just a little, and he widened his stance so that he wouldn't fall.

Dagny's look of concern came into his narrowed field a vision. "What?"

Trygve nodded. "You have to go warn the elders," he told her, his voice growing quick and desperate. "They can't use whatever plan she gave them."

Her eyes narrowed. "And what about you?"

Biting his tongue, he knew what he would do. It would be stupid. But it was worth it. "I'm going after her."

Dagny groaned. "What is your obsession with her? Even after you know that she's an enemy, still you want to go and find her?"

"I owe her the truth," he said meekly. "Just like she owes it to me."

Even if it got him killed, he had to tell her. She just might be the fox he did love.