Stardust

are you ready?

Sometimes I wish that I could freeze the picture

And save it from the funny tricks of time - Mamma Mia

Stella

The sound of my ringtone wakes me up from an accidental nap. I've been in my room since coming back from the beach, and I'm not even sure who I'm hiding from. Conrad? Laurel? Belly? All of the above?

- Hello, my love. - Daisy's voice glitches as I bring my phone to my ear. - I miss you.

- I miss you more. - A smile takes over my lips. God, I love this woman. I won the godmother lottery. - How's the album going?

- If we survive, this is gonna be one hell of a story.

The Six have been working on new stuff for months and Teddy finally got them to sit down and organize it in one album. If it goes according to plan, it'll be their 5th. The first four albums focused on rock with folk and indie, but this one is different. It's gonna be pure rock n' roll. Daisy and my dad have been working on new lyrics and I am so here for their - even more - rebellious phase.

- How's the beach treating you?

- The same as usual.

That's a straight-up lie at this point. It's impossible to convince myself that things haven't changed after everything that went down yesterday. Conrad kissed me. Belly snuck out to go to a party. She and the boys were arrested. Not to mention the moment I had with Conrad on the beach earlier.

I'd be lying if I said I'm not curious about the secret. I've been thinking about possibilities all day. Is it his mom's secret? His dad's? Jeremiah's? How bad is it? Is Adam cheating on Susannah? Is she cheating on him? The only thing I know is that it's bad, Conrad wouldn't be acting out if it was good news.

- Cami told me you're going to be a debutante. - Daisy tries and fails to conceal her laughter. - And now we're trying to figure out if you were kidnapped or abducted. Quick, tell me you love Chipotle if Susannah is holding you against your will.

- It's not that bad. - I don't believe what I'm saying. - I'm only doing it so Belly isn't alone.

- I know. - She sighs. Daisy has the same opinion as Conrad when it comes to my relationship with my little sister. - When does it start?

- We have the first round of torture today.

I look at the dress Susannah bought for me. The one that looks so familiar it's easy to forget it's not the dress Ashley made for me all those years ago. It fucks me up to think how much time has passed.

- There are these events on the side... - I start talking, but hesitate. I don't wanna give her hope. No one in the world wants me to go back to singing more than Daisy. - Conrad said he could try to get me a spot to perform. If I want.

She's silent for a long time. I guess I'm not the only one who doesn't know how to navigate this topic. It's been so long. What if I can't do it anymore? What if I suck?

- I think I speak for everyone when I say this would be the greatest thing to happen all year. - She tries to be quiet, but I hear her sniffling. - Are you ready for that?

The whole band knows what happened. It took months, but Ashley eventually forced me to tell my parents. Mom told Daisy and aunt Karen that same night because she freaked out when I told her about the heroin. She told the girls so they could keep an eye open. I get it, but I hate that it makes them treat me like a glass doll. I've been straight edge for almost a year. I'm in therapy. I'm fine. Not back to singing fine, but sober fine.