Chameleon ✔️

Who am I?

I'm a human. I'm a female. I'm a daughter, a student, a friend. A witness. A prey.

I run. I hide. I wear a disguise. I stay behind closed doors. I don't let anyone in.

I read people's emotions in the form of colors. I know what they're feeling and the connotations of each thought. I am at an advantage. I have the upper hand. I am a telepath. An empath. A synesthesiac.

Aspen was a little girl who was vibrant, flirtatious, jubilant, loving. She had many friends, but her two best ones were her mom and her dad. She loved animals; she loved herself; she loved the plants and the sand and the hills and the sky and the way her voice could carry itself on the wind when she sang.

I know a few key characteristics of Aspen. The texture of her hair, her eyes the color of spring, her skin cold to the touch. Likes: wool blankets, movie OSTs, sitcom reruns, books, colors. Dislikes: mice as pets, raisins in cookies, throw pillows on couches, traveling, and colors. Favorite book: The Adventures of Alice in Wonderland; Favorite movie: The Breakfast Club; Favorite band: It changes all the time, but right now it's Twenty-One Pilots.

I know all of these elementary things. But do I really know her? What career path she'd be best suited for had she the opportunity; her hopes and dreams and vision of the future — Does she see herself getting married? Does she want kids? Small town or big city?; the way she likes to be kissed — slowly at first and then like the initial high drop of a roller coaster. I don't know all her answers. But I think I'm starting to.

Alyssa is the fake personality of Aspen, the same fake personality as every other girl I've pretended to be. Quiet. Dull. Bland. Small. Insignificant. The back of the classroom. A part of the crowd, a needle in a haystack. It's all a part of the act. Not getting found.

Or is it? Have I let Alyssa and Ashton and Arden become me? Has the camouflage I wear outside of my body become permanently blended into my flesh and bone? Have I really become invisible?

Am I really nobody?