The Girl Who Loved Me Selflessly (SwaSan Story)

Chapter 15 'Peace'

Third Person's POV:

She was sitting on the cold floor, looking at the couch and her hands, which have his finger prints mark. Tracing the marks he closed her eyes and a tear rolled down.

"Why Swara, Why are you so weak All you do is cry, and cry."

Wiping her tears from the back of her hands, she went towards the bedroom. Reaching there she remembered their first night, despite of his hate. He was gentle with her. That's why she thought he could love her but guess she was proved wrong.

Walking towards the edge of bed she saw the mirror and saw the image of a girl who was nothing but a curse.

Today, for the first time. She didn't think about her love for him, but she thought of his hate for her.

Today, she wholeheartedly accepted that yes he can't love her. Because she don't deserve it.

She let out a bitter smile and shook her head. Now tears are nowhere to found maybe they know nothing will change if they came out or not. It doesn't matter if her eyes are crying or not,But her heart is.

...

1 week later !
It's been a week nothing has changed for swara. She was same no maybe maybe more miserable, more devasted.

But who cares ?

She was making her way to the kitchen for the cleaning when she remembered she hadn't eaten anything since 2 days.

But who cares ?

She have been cutting her arms every day.

But who cares ?

Yes, No body fucking I care. She have never learned how to be felt loved or cared. Because she was the fucking whore, who was used for the pleasure. She was the girl who can make you her entire world but the end what she get NOTHING.

Yes, she don't deserve anybody's care or love. Because a whore can't be loved, because nobody let a whore forget her damn past.

She remembered how Sanskar had taunted her "Whores Like You don't know anything"

But he had never thought why had she became that. It was never her choice to choose that profession. She was forced, by her own her parents and because of Sneha she had to that.

She became selfless for her step sister but nobody fucking cares.

Nobody not even a enemy should feel the pain she was feeling right now.

It feels like someone is squeezing her heart, the pain is too much that she wants nothing more than peace.

It's like there is a burden on her soul and it is slowly crushing it.

Sitting on the bathroom floor, she stared at the blood oozing from her upper arms.

Closing her eyes she let out a sigh. Because for the first time she was feeling nothing. Nothing at all. She was feeling NUMB.

Sighing ..

Even in numbness she never forgot to remember him. Maybe it's her love for him, but in numbness all she can think is him.

Even when he hurt her in a way she least expected it.

She felt peace.

Because she knows she don't deserve anything other than hateness.

Standing up she wiped her arms, it stings. HARD.

She closed her eyes again while sighing and thought   "I LIKED IT"

She wiped it again and again. Until she can't feel it anymore.

...

2 weeks later !

2 weeks later he returned home, looking around the house there was no sign of SWARA.

Walking upstairs he passed by the room and searched for the entire house but he never found her.

Rubbing his face by his hands, he remembered what he had told her last time before he left the house.

Running towards the last stop, the balcony.  His heart was thumping and there he found piece if bloody papers.

"I hate Myself, Sanskaar. I hate myself a lot. Y'know I never wanted to be the reason behind your sorrows. I only wanted to be the reason behind your smile, but I became the thing that hurt you so much that you can't even hate me, as you say you loath me. But Sanskaar, today I understood I don't deserve your love.

Yes, I don't deserve it. You were right whore like me don't know anything. I was wrong to think I can receive love.

But Sanskaar I wanna say sorry to you.

Sorry for snatching Sneha away from you.
Sorry for killing sneha.
Sorry for marrying you.
Sorry for being the villain in your life.
Sorry for being the reason behind your sorrows.

In short SORRY FOR ALL THE THINGS I HAVE DONE.

You wanted me out of your sight, At least I can give you this. After all the damage I had done. I will still say I LOVE YOU SANSKAAR.

And Happy Sixth Month Anniversary Sanskaar and Goodbye

I hope now you will be happy.

P.S: I broke the promise to him by leaving you.

Reading the letter with shaking hands, he didn't know what she had done.

He sat on the bed with a loud thud and saw some paper burning on the side of the washroom.

Thank God they were too many in quantity that's why they didn't burned full.

But what he saw left him in shocked it was the contract. The freaking contract she signed.

It was written in the contract that if she would not marry him then they will kill sneha and if she will than sneha will not be harmed plus she would be free from her so called profession.

...

Episode ends !

Author's Note:
So guys ! Finally completed half of the book. And guys many of you think suicide is not the option but guys try to put yourself in swara's shoes and think this seriously. She is not strong like others.

Quite a long Chappy right ?

But do you think I reached your expectation because I seriously think I didn't.

Ney cover for the Second part of the book tell me did you like it ? As always it is made by Zeenu AKA Zeenia_Shrew

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