The Hooded Girl

Chapter 7: The Exit

RHEA'S POV
Winston holds my hand tightly and brings the gun to his temple. The others have already started walking. I can't leave Winston, though. I just can't bring myself to do it.

"Rhea, tell Minho that he shouldn't let his past haunt him and that he was a great friend and leader. Tell Thomas that I owe him my life for saving me. Tell Frypan that I still hate his stupid food. And... tell Newt that the wall was in the past and that he can't let it hurt him anymore," Winston says softly, his grip on my hand going tighter.

I nod. "Okay. Okay."

Winston takes in a deep breath and smiles, bringing the gun to his temple.

"Thank you," He murmurs.

And he pulls the trigger.

~

The gunshot was deafening. It seems to ring in my ears far longer than usual. I close my eyes and take in a deep breath as his hand looses its grip on mine and he goes limp.

I stand up just as a tear falls from my eyes. I reach up to get rid of it, taking a second to collect myself before walking off, not looking at Winston. Knowing that if I did, I probably wouldn't be able to move for a while.

I manage to catch up to the group pretty easily. They are all walking in single file so I walk behind them, behind Minho.

"He did it or you did it?" He asks, not even turning behind.

"He," I reply.

Minho nods but still doesn't turn to face me. I'm glad for that. I feel sore and terrible. Death is something I can't take easily. I always feel like it's my fault.

I knew Newt would be the one to pass him the gun. He has that about him. He knows how Winston felt. He knew he would too. That's why I had looked at him, encouraging him to go on. It's why I actually talk to him. He understands everyone's situations.

Maybe, deep down, you want him to understand yours.

I shove that treacherous thought away, swallowing thickly. What Winston had said about Newt confuses me too. What had he said? Tell Newt that the wall was in the past and that he can't let it hurt him anymore.

What that had meant, I plan to find out. But I think I already know. I just don't want to really believe it.

I dig into my jacket pocket and pull out a white pill. I put it into my mouth and start chewing. Almost instantly, the throbbing in my head stops.

I look down at my hands which slowly stop shaking. They are still so pale that it's kind of surprising since we're in the hot sun.

"It's getting late," Thomas states.

We group together once more and I hide my hands in my pockets. Aris comes and stands next to me, placing a hand on my shoulder. Aris has experienced loss, like me. That's our connection. We know how to push through loss. In our time together in the Forest, me and him made a strong bond. I treat him like a brother. He's taller than me by a bit, so older brother suits him better.

"You okay?" He whispers.

I nod. I'm tempted to say something else but everyone's looking at us. Aris keeps his hand on my shoulder, though.

"Where should we rest?" Minho asks.

"Let's just keep walking. There doesn't seem to be anything," Quill responds, looking around as she squints in the dying daylight.

"You think there'll be anything?" Newt asks, squinting.

"There's something, alright. If there wasn't, Thomas and Rhea wouldn't have led us here. They're the brains. They know what they're doing," Aris replies, giving my shoulder a squeeze.

Thomas nods. "Yeah. There's a cave over there. Maybe we could camp out there for now and... recollect ourselves."

I couldn't agree more. The sound of Winston pulling the trigger rings in my mind. The words he had said echos in my head.

~

The rest eat as I hide in the shadows at the corner. They laugh at times and none of them pay any attention to me. Good. That's good.

Newt, Sonya and Quill talk. Aris, Frypan and Harriet are together. Minho and Teresa and Thomas are talking about something. Quill seems to be having an especially good time.

As usual, when I'm in the dark and unseen, the memories drown me.