My Parents are Gay

You're Really Bad at This

Narrator's POV

"Wow Doctor Dad, you're thirty six?" Peter asked, looking at the candles on Stephen's cake.

"Yes?" Stephen answered looking at Peter.

"That makes you twelve years younger than Papa." Oliver said.

Tony, Stephen, and Peter looked at Oliver.

The seven year old turned out a brainiac, just like both of his dads and his older brother.

Peter looked at his dads. "Wow Iron Dad, you're old."

Tony looked at Peter with his resting bitch face. "Alright. Peter gets no cake." He said.

"Whaaaaaaaaat?" Peter laughed. "No Iron Dad. I was just kidding." He said. His laughter stopped. "Please don't send me to my room without cake." Peter said.

///0///0

"Uuuuhhh..." Peter groaned as Stephen carried him to his room. Peter's head rested on his dad's shoulder. Cake icing outlined his lips. Tony followed Stephen with glasses of wine in his hands. Oliver was right behind them, following.

They made it to the top of the stairs and into Peter's room. Stephen placed Peter in his bed and tucked him in.

"Doctor Dad, I think I ate too much cake." He said.

"You did." Stephen shrugged, giving him a nervous smile; almost wanting to laugh at him.

Oliver only watched his big brother curl into a ball in his bed. "I told you to eat only one piece." He said.

Peter looked at his little brother. "It was so good." Peter groaned.

"You might want to use this later tonight." Oliver said, placing a trash bin near the side of Peter's bed.

"Thanks bud." Peter said weakly.

"Well, sleep well Peter. Let's hope that stomach ache goes away. Goodnight." Stephen said.

"Uh-huh." Peter groaned and got under the covers.

Stephen and the other two left Peter's room and closed the door.

"Alright Oliver, it's time for you to go to bed too." Stephen said, turning to the room across Peter's.

"Okay." Oliver said. He ran over to his bed and jumped in it. Stephen and Tony looked at him. "B-But will you tuck me in?" Oliver asked. He was already at the age where tucking wasn't all that fun anymore, but he knew Stephen enjoyed tucking his little one in; so he always asked for him tuck him in.

"Of course." Stephen smiled and went over to Oliver's bedside. He tucked in his son. "Better?"

"Mhm." Oliver nodded, smiling and tucked in.

"Goodnight Oliver." Stephen kissed Oliver's forehead.

"Goodnight Dad." Oliver said, smiling.

Stephen walked over to the door. Oliver watched him. Tony stood at the door, smiling. Oliver gave him a smile before his Papa walked away. Oliver watched Stephen slowly close the door and leave a crack to let light come in. He listened to his dads' footsteps become faint. When he could t hear them any longer, he quickly jumped out of the covers and grabbed a flashlight out from under his pillow. He took a mechanics book from inside the sleeve of his pillow and burrowed himself under the covers, turning on the flashlight.

///0///0

Stephen and Tony sat at the counter. Stephen looked at his wine glass and swirled the wine around in the glass.

"Do you remember what happened last time we had wine?" Stephen asked.

"How could I not?" Tony asked. He looked at Stephen, smirking. "I had you moaning in bed." He said.

Stephen laughed. "But you also got yourself kicked out of a restaurant."

"It wasn't my fault. The manager was being an asshole." Tony said.

"I mean, you were causing a lot of trouble. Not to mention terribly loud." Stephen said.

"Oh yeah?" Tony pulled Stephen close to him. "Let's see how terribly loud you get when I've got you in bed." Tony smirked.

"Knowing you...not very." Stephen said.

"Oh trust me sweetie..." Tony cupped Stephen's chin and pulled his face closer. Their lips brushed against each other. "...I'll have you begging."

"I'd like to see you try." Stephen said.

"Then why don't you take us to the room?" Tony asked.

Stephen gave a small snort. A crooked smiled formed on his lips.

"What?" Tony asked confused.

"I'm sorry." Stephen laughed, pulling his face away from Tony and laughing to the side. "You're the absolute worst at flirting." He said.

Tony rolled his eyes and looked away. "Stephen you're a professional at ruining the moment." He said.

"Okay okay...sorry." Stephen cleared the laughter from his throat. "Sorry." He took in a deep breath and let it out. He sat with his back straight and his chest out. "I-" He snorted again, laughing. Tony gave him a smile, shaking his head. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." Stephen laughed.

Tony loved seeing his husband laugh. It brought him happiness. "Stephen, are you drunk?" He asked.

"I haven't even touched the wine. It's been sitting in my glass the entire time." He said. "I-" He laughed again.

"Oh my god, Stephen. It wasn't even that funny." Tony said, trying not to laugh. Stephen's laughter was getting contagious. "I don't get why you're still laughing."

"Oh my- oof. Ow, ow." Stephen laughed. "My stomach. Tony." He was cramping.

"You deserve it." Tony said.

"It's just that- you...y-you..." Stephen couldn't stop. "You should've seen your face." Stephen laughed.

Tony got up from his seat. "Goodnight Stephen." He said, walking up the stairs. Stephen only continued to laugh. "You're sleeping on the couch tonight."

Stephen stopped. "Aww, Tony wait. It was cute. It was cute, I promise."