Dreams Fade Away (Sample)

5. H I S H E L P L E S N E S S

Chapter Five: HIS HELPLESSNESS

I had no idea why Zara acted surprised when I told her that me and Natalie decided to abort the baby if I turned out to be my child. And if it didn't turn out to be mine, then the decision to keep the baby will be solely Natalie's.

I loved her, more than anything and she would be a fool if she thought I would let go of her that easily.

Having a child with Natalie would mess up the situation on so many levels. Me and Natalie would be parents of a baby and where exactly would Zara fit in the picture?

Zara was my mate and I would try as long as it takes to make her believe that I really was sorry about what I did. Having a child in the equation would make the situation unsalvageable.

Sleeping with Natalie was a mistake and whatever reasons I come up for my actions could never redeem me. I was smart enough to know that. I had made shitty choices and now I was suffering through the consequences.

My wolf had been constantly whining and whimpering at the loss of our mate. I tried hard to placate my wolf, that we would get out mate back. It would definitely take some time but I deserved the torture. I would go through hell if it meant I would get another chance with her. It was perfectly clear to everyone that I didn't deserve her but I needed her more than anything and I would let go of everything else that mattered to me if it meant that we could be together.

I wasn't the only one hurting in this disturbing turn of events. Natalie had cried so many times in the past couple of days that I wondered how she was even able to stand straight. I knew how much Zara meant to her and one stupid drunken mistake was going to cost her a lifetime of friendship. I bet she now regrets the day she even saw my face. She was blaming and cursing herself over and over again and I felt helpless as I realised I was the cause of the rift between them.

If the stupid doctor hadn't poured his guts in the waiting room, my parents would have been oblivious to everything and would have come to know about it if only the situation demanded it. But the werewolf couldn't exactly disobey an order from his Alpha, could he? It resulted it being the both of my parents hugely disappointed in me. They never put it in words exactly but they had hoped that I would take a different course of action with my mate than the one they had taken. They didn't want me to follow their footsteps and till now, that was exactly what I had done.

Saying I was ashamed of myself was an understatement. I was disgusted with myself.

I sat on my bed with a variety of thoughts running through my head a mile a minute. Today was the day of the revelation. After being asked by his alpha, the doctor had promised to deliver the result of the paternity test himself. It wasn't a personal matter anymore, it was a pack matter.

Zara hadn't talked to me in days, hadn't let me come near her in days. I knew I deserved it but I missed her terribly, the feel of her soft body against mine, her smell in my sheets and her soft lips against her mine. I could feel my wolf yapping and happy every time the sweet scent of chocolate and pines hit my nose. I could feel my wolf become weak otherwise.

In my office. Now.
My father had more or less ignored me after that day in the hospital. I knew he was disappointed with me. He had, countless of times taught me the importance of a mate and I had done everything in my power to belittle and deceive mine.
My mom was troubled a lot too and I knew she was trying not to take much stress because of the baby inside her.

I knew that the both of them felt that their life teachings for their son were a waste. If my actions had been satisfactory, I could have contradicted these allegations but I couldn't.